Charlie's Books

Charlie's Books
Buon Giorno, Amici!

Our motto ...

Leave the (political) party. Take the cannoli.

"It always seems impossible until it's done." Nelson Mandela

Right now 6 Stella crime novels are available on Kindle for just $.99 ... Eddie's World has been reprinted and is also available from Stark House Press (Gat Books).

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Holy Bench Press Batman! … No He Can’t … Roman Polanski … Monday Night Foosball … Verdicts … The Lock Of The Week … and the DOC says ...


Holy Bench Press Batman! ... for those of yous who think weightlifting isn’t a contact sport, read this: Stafon Johnson is a tailback at USC (and a good one). The other day while doing bench presses with 275 pounds, the bar somehow slipped from his hand and crushed his throat. From the LA Times. Johnson underwent 7 hours of emergency surgery after the accident:

Johnson was performing a "bench press" lift with what doctors were told was 275 pounds when the bar apparently slipped from his hand and landed on his throat. USC officials said an assistant strength and conditioning coach was working with Johnson as a "spotter" when the accident happened, but he was unable to stop the bar from injuring the player.

Initially spitting blood from his mouth and nose, Johnson was rushed by ambulance to the hospital.

At 5 feet 11 and 210 pounds, Johnson was able to survive the accident because the muscles around his neck helped him keep open a breathing passage, Hinika said at a news conference Tuesday.

"Had that been any one of us, meaning me, I would not have survived," Hinika said. "His neck was so solid and so muscular, that actually helped maintain his airway."

Johnson is being fed through a tube in his stomach but could resume eating normally in only a few days. Hinika said the tailback probably would remain hospitalized for at least a week and there was no timetable for his recovery or release. He said the reconstruction could require revisions in the future, and that hospital staff were monitoring the running back for infections and other complications.

Now, I can’t imagine how you lose the bar, unless you’re grip is without wrapping the thumb. I’ve seen guys do that several times (resting the bar in their hands with their fists closed (as opposed to open and wrapped around the bar) and I’ve always thought it was dangerous. I can’t imagine how this happened but the kid is sure lucky to have been so powerfully developed around the neck.

Oy-vey ... my calls for Saturday’s RAW meet go like this: 325, 375, 390? ...

No He Can’t ... or maybe “so far he hasn’t” ... because so far President Obama is one big O-fer ... he followed Bush’s lead and gave into Wall Street’s extortion (and appointed one of their own to lead the charge), he hasn’t passed a single piece of legislation regulating what had caused the fiscal problem in the first place (not one) ... we’re still not out of Iraq (what he labeled “the wrong war in the wrong place at the wrong time”) ... we’re not out of Afghanistan (and in fact have dug in deeper) ... we haven’t caught Bin Laden (if anyone cares anymore) ... and it looks like we won’t be getting national health insurance anytime soon.

So, amici, you tell me the difference between this clown and the last one.

The picture above is a turd (or several) like the featured celebrity of the next thread.

Roman Polanski ... I say we give it the thumbs up or thumbs down test. What would you do if it were your daughter? If you think it’s okay for a 43 year old to feed your 13 year old daughter Quaaludes and champagne and then forcibly rape her, then plead guilty to the charges and hop a plane out of the country for the next 30+ years, give it a thumbs up (and then have your focking head examined). On the other hand, if you think like we at Knucksline, Mr. Polanski should have his sphincter muscles expanded with a very slow moving Prius, vote thumbs down.

The idea that 30+ years of living the life of a very well to do fugitive somehow precludes his arrest now can only come from Hollywood’s ivory towers. Unbelievable.

Monday Night Foosball ... “The Dallas Cowgirls vs. the Carolina Putz’s … take the Points and the Putz’s ... big upset ... Wade Phillips takes the next step toward his early retirement.”

Did I write that?

Maybe DOC has something ... maybe reading Knucksline and then going the other way is your key to financial freedom ...

Verdicts ...

LD (Larry David is back and Curb Your Enthusiasm couldn’t be funnier). This show remains at the top of my list. Mad Men got a whole lot more interesting with the shaving off of a British foot last episode ... but if Joan Holloway is really leaving ... so am I!

The World According to Garp ... oh, well, maybe I should’ve stopped where I was last post (Tuesday). Finished it and was sorely disappointed by the way too long ending/epilogue. It become overtly silly by then and I couldn’t wait to get through with it. Oh, those last 100 pages … I’ll still be seeing the movie but more out of curiosity than some burning desire.

Exodus ... by Leon Uris ... couldn’t finish it ... frankly, it started off so canned, I couldn’t get beyond page 40 … no more Uris for moi. This was a shame for me because the subject matter (UK/Israel/Palestine) has always fascinated me. The Irish-British history lesson of Trinity was fascinating ... QB7 was a bit of a disappointment (I’d already known much of the history of the nazi war crimes trials) but this was perhaps too much Uris in one year ...

Lady Chatterley’s Lover ... great premise (a young woman’s husband is wounded and paralyzed from the waist down during WWI) ... Constance Chatterley is in her prime and missing out on life. She’s a clever girl and very observant of male foibles ... although a bit heavy on the various introspections (and hardly ever given a warning when there's a transition from one to another), an intriguing read (at least so far --- about 150 pages to go). I can sure see where it turned some stuffy heads back in the day ... but fock’em for being so stuffy. LCL seems like a very appropriate read for any woman staring down the commitment barrel.

This one wound up in the British court tried under the absurd Obscene Publications Act of 1959. One of the objections was to the frequent use of the word "fuck" and its derivatives. Another objection involves the use of the word "cunt". Geesh, imagine if they ate dinner at my house?

Just kidding, amici. At Casa Stella, we say “fock” or “Rhymes with bunt” ...

Anyway, it was a not guilty verdict (fortunately) and it is a recommended read for those interested in what upset the apple cart in 1960.

The Lock Of The Week ...
oh-vey, not again ... don’t curse the Bengalis, Knuckman ... but the football Gods have been zeroing in closer and closer, amici ... they’re talking to me loud and clear this week (or was that Spartacus?) ... Frank Gore was injured on the first play of the game last week or that lock (San Fernando 45’s over the Domed Ones) was indeed a LOCK. This week the football Gods are whispering in my ear ... “Gordo (Fatso), you’re going to bomb out in the Weightlifting meet Saturday, but the Cincinnati Bengalis will crush the Cleveland Brownies and Mr. Mangenius will have run out of QB’s to play Hide the Offense with."

Gordo? What’s up with that?

Bet $200 In Knucks We Trust Bucks on the Bengalis and the OVER ... and recoup what I lost the first 3 weeks of the season.

Oy-vey, vey iz mir ...


And the DOC says ...

Hey Chaz,

So, Kevin Jennings is the new "Safe School Czar" or at least he will be until Saturday midnight when he resigns. Now, was Jennings the first choice or was Obama waiting to see if Roman Polanski was going to be available?

Where does the Bamster find these people?

Does he know anybody who is not fucked up? I think he just hands out these czar-ships to people he passes in the hall while on his way to David Letterman rehearsals.

"Hello Mr. President. I would like to be your new Firearms Control Czar."

"What's your name?"

"John Hinckley, sir."

"That sounds good. Tell Gibbs (Mrs. Doubtfire) to put out the announcement."

I'm waiting for Gary Busey to be crowned as the new Mental Health Czar.

On Friday, Obama will be heading to Denmark to make sure that the 2016 Olympics will be held in Chicago. Luckily we have hundreds of millions of dollars laying around to put on a show for foreigners who hate us anyway. The only saving grace to having the Olympics in Chicago is we will save a bunch of money on security. Even suicide bombers are afraid to walk around in Chicago.

Due to the First Lady's busy schedule, you know with the garden and everything, she couldn't wait until Friday, so she took the other 747 and full security team.

No carbon footprint there and the money drain is running free and fast.

It's scary Chaz, 3 more years of this crap and then a race riot at the end when for obviously rascist reasons President Fredo doesn't get re-elected.

Have a nice day, boyo