It’s all football today ...
Lock this already ... oy-vey, amici, zero for three! Did the forty-fives get robbed or what? Okay, okay, I can’t pick on favre beans anymore. The geriatric really did pull one out of his ass yesterday, but the San Fernando Forty-Fives lost that game when their special teams broke down at the start of the 2nd half and allowed the Domed Ones to return a kickoff. Hey, Mike Singletary is the man ... somebody in Buffalo pay attention, please. Mike Singletary is the next GREAT coach. A no nonsense guy who gets his players to play over their heads and believe in the confidence they attain week to week. Where Favre bean head gets credit from the ugly one is the amount of hits this guy takes—quite a few. I’m still not as impressed as his HOF stats (because the intercepts kind of negate the TD’s for me), but he did pull it off when it counted yesterday.
Coach Imbecile ... Dick Jauron stays with the no huddle, no win against another high powered offense and it was probably just enough time for the Bills defense to stay on the field to collapse, once again, in the 4th quarter (when the Aints scored 17 unanswered points) ... speaking of unanswered points, the only Bills score (from the vaunted NO HUDDLE, NO WIN) offense was a fake field goal. The Aints had the ball 7 more minutes than we did, ran 10 more plays (because they were running us over and didn’t stop the clock with 50+ passes) and our offense, minus the freak fake field goal, scored a goose egg.
The no huddle ... great idea, guys.
Press Conferences ... “I just go with the play that was called,” T.O. (no catches) said over and over and over when baited for some new controversy by reporters looking for a scoop. Coach Imbecile (the Alan Alda of the NFL) seemed happy to stay in it for “most of the game” … geesh. Trent Edwards had the usual excuses and “it’s something to learn from” mantra.
Next week my beloved New York State Buffalo Bills play the much hated Miami Dolphinations in Miami ... the wildcat vs. the no huddle, no win. Maybe if it’s really hot and humid coach Imbecile can find a way (no huddle) to keep the defense on the field for 45 minutes this game.
Fireman Ed ... I love this guy!
Y-E-T-S, Yets, Yets, Yets ... well, I’m still not as convinced as NFL pundits, but Ryan does have the Moonachie Yets playing over their heads. They beat a very good Tennessee Tuxedo team yesterday and there’s no knocking last week’s win over the cheaterfaces. I don’t think Ryan does himself any favors playing Maverick with some of his comments, but it’s nice to see some fire back in the NFL. Hopefully, they’re over confident when we play them October 18 in the Moonachie Meadowlands ... or when we utilize that other genius football decision by the Bills management ... our December 3rd in a dome in Toronto game against Y-E-T another division rival ... last year it was the Dolphinations we played in a dome in December in Toronto ... good to know the Bills management is taking advantage of that home field advantage.
Around the tournament wrap up:
The Bengalis ... kicked ass against the Iron Ores yesterday … very impressive.
Wes Cravens … suddenly Eric Mangenius is looking like a dumbski.
The Lionesses … of Detroit took it to the Yellowskins … goodbye coach Zorn.
The Felines … over the Sam Houston Rangers in a close one … honestly, does anybody care?
Cheaterfaces … win one over the Falconless … cheaters should be 1-2, but the Y-E-T-S, Yets, Yets, Yets! are 3-0 anyway. Go Moonachie!
Packerless … beat up on a high school team, the St. Louis Blues … another one nobody cares about.
Moonachie II (Giants) … crush the Buc Stops in Tampe 24-0 … Moonachie (the junior league edition) is for real.
Dog Killers … Michael Vick looked like he might be having nightmares but the Chefs are no match for anybody.
Bearless … over the Sea Pigeons ... but it sure wasn’t easy.
Raiderettes … crushed by the Bronckettes. Could Denver be for real?
Chargerless … beat up the Dolphinations (which made moi happy) but that had much to do with a terrible Dolphin fumble on the one yard line after driving the length of the field and Pennington’s 4,000th shoulder injury.
Arizona by way of St. Louis Cardinals … prove last year was a parity fluke. Pure garbage. Coltless took them to the woodshed.
And tonight’s featured matchup … The Dallas Cowgirls vs. the Carolina Putz’s … take the Points and the Putz’s … big upset … Wade Phillips takes the next step toward his early retirement.
And the DOC says ...
Just a quick note to the Amicis:
If you want to live job-free like the Docster: Wait for Friday, write down the Knucks Lock of the Week. Sell everything you own... houses, cars, jewelry, children, organs. Put it all on dem bums dat got no freaking chance to win. I've been doing it all season and I just use the unemployment checks to pay for my valet.
Unfortunately, this system is not as effective for the Kentucky Derby etc. It will only let you know which horse won't win.
Knucksline... "your key to financial freedom".