Charlie's Books

Charlie's Books
Buon Giorno, Amici!

Our motto ...

Leave the (political) party. Take the cannoli.

"It always seems impossible until it's done." Nelson Mandela

Right now 6 Stella crime novels are available on Kindle for just $.99 ... Eddie's World has been reprinted and is also available from Stark House Press (Gat Books).

Thursday, March 18, 2010

Dirty Sweet ... Goldmember ... The Meet ... DOC’s fix & a nice review of JP ...


Dirty Sweet ... a Canadian crime novel by author John McFetridge that pits a woman very conscious of the fact her window of opportunity is closing quickly. She’s in a financial crunch (a bad economy and money owed) and that enemy of any women leaning on her looks, age, is gaining fast. Roxanne Keyes needs to use what she has before it’s too late. She’s street sharp, still has her looks and isn’t easily sidetracked by normal annoyances such as guilt or concern for others. When she witnesses a hit and recognizes one of the men involved (in this case, the driver—Boris), the anxious tumblers of her mind spin and the possibilities (opportunities in the form of leverage) are irresistible. The tradeoff, helping the police, offer nothing in return. One of the cops isn’t buying Roxanne’s version of what she claims she did and/or didn’t see, but the guy she did see driving the car is a Russian with ties to the mob back in his native home; a guy she almost rented warehouse space to in the past. The shooter was the driver’s father’s best friend (Boris calls him Uncle) and the real deal; a hit man (or any man he needs to be). Then there’s an Internet Porn maven (Vince Fournier) with a shady past who rents space from the real estate agency Roxanne works for and he needs more space for his ever expanding business (more opportunity for an aggressive femme fatale) ... so many men, which one should she choose ... Vince works a deal with Roxanne ... so does Boris ... and then they all work a deal together only its slightly more dangerous than routine business expansion. There are stolen cars being shipped overseas, Canadian biker gangs every bit as ruthless as the Russian mob itself and some terrific writing going on that makes the tale being told a genuine page turner. And there’s music ... lots of musical references back to the 70-80’s that will make every reader feel right at home. And where is home, you ask? Oh, Canada, baby! Toronto, in fact. And you’ll learn a few things about our neighbors up north (the same thieves just waiting to steal my beloved New York State Buffalo Bills, by the way) but you won’t feel uncomfortable or lost because the author’s style is very smooth and his dialogue catching. McFetridge is the second contemporary Canadian crime author I’ve read (that I know of). Sandra Ruttan (The Nolan, Hart & Tain Series) is the other and both do their native home proud. Dirty Sweet is an Elmore Leonard north novel; a fun and thrilling read from the hit you’ll witness at the very beginning to the explosive end.

Check out an interview with John and a review of his latest here (at the New Mystery Reader).

Goldmember … Tuesday night was a tough one for the ugly one. I crossed the Outerbridge three times in less than 20 hours (once to go to work, once to use a substitute gym on Staten Island and once to pick up the Principessa Ann Marie after she was dropped off from Nursing school). I was exhausted from not sleeping much the night before. I lifted like shit and needed one of two things; a large well done Sicilian pie with extra gravy (sauce to you nons), a bottle of Chivas Regal or a funny movie. Alright, that was three things, but I chose the funny movie and a gallon of milk and I was laughing like an idiot throughout the film ... and even when I went to bed I couldn’t stop laughing (which led the Principessa to wake up and say, “You’re an idiot”).

How I know I was laughing like one.

What’s up with the powerlifting meet(s)? Nothing much, really. There’s one on the 27th of March that’s close to home but I’m not sure it’ll be worth the entry fee. I’m lifting like crrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrap right now and won’t know until this weekend if I can compete in the open.

DOC has been more than just jonesing for a political fight (or is it to insult the ugly one?). The 12-step program is not helping him with these once a week TK’s. Before he goes completely off his right wing gourd (and we have to deal with Knucks being called “sissy boy” again), we’re going to wet his beak with a TK political observation ...

Kucinich’s sellout on the sellout … On March 14, Dennis Kucinich (someone I find agreement with on some social issues) had this to say in the Cleveland Plain Dealer: “Absent a strong public option or legal protection for states that wish to pursue single payer, the bill that the president is proposing is a step in the wrong direction. Even with the few modest improvements in the bill, the insurance companies will still have dozens of loopholes to deny care and continue to find ways to leave Americans with the unpayable bill.”

And then on Wednesday, after getting a nifty ride in Air Force One, Kucinich agreed to vote for what he called a step in the wrong direction.

He’s not the only one on the Democratic Left (what TK feels is the fugazy left) ... Michael Moore joined the chorus as well: “This bill is a joke” but he’s also pushing for it to pass now too. It is a call to arms to defend at all costs (including the left's self interest) the Obama Administration. Now one really does have to wonder if they think of him as The Savior.

My question to the blind faithers supporting the Democratic sellout is this: After all the FACTUAL evidence in just the past few years of how Democratic Party legislators admitted to not having read legislation they voted in favor of (i.e., the war(s), the bailouts, this 2700+ page health care bill, etc.), what makes you think that in this piece of legislation, the same party will have done the necessary due diligence to make sure insurance companies won’t find the loopholes Senator Kucinich stated they’ll still have ... to deny care and continue to find ways to leave Americans with the unpayable bill?

Well, at least they won’t have Ralph Nader to blame for this one.

No sooner than we finished the above political teaser for his DOCness than he shot off this rant about Haiti … why he should ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS take his meds.

Here now, the DOC:

Hey Chaz,

It seems that our armed forces providing humanitarian aid in Haiti will no longer fly the American flag over their bases. This is to prevent anyone from thinking that we are in Haiti as occupiers. In reality, since New Orleans is being renovated we are in dire need of an area with no standing buildings, no food, no water and a large unemployed populace. There is no one taking credit for this bold move, but really, who does this sound like. I’ll give you a hint, Chaz. Who do you know that bows then apologizes to every foreign national he meets?

When the Army comes to town they are dressed in digital camo and accessorized with M4 carbines, heavy boots and other implements of destruction. Obviously, what Haiti actually hoped for was the New Rochelle Ladies Auxiliary. They come dressed in tasteful print dresses, accessorized with support hose and sensible shoes with matching purses. Our armed forces smell of sweat and Hoppes #9 (that’s gun cleaner, sissy boy). The Ladies Auxiliary smells of Bengay and old lavender.

Oh… almost forgot. The other thing the American Armed Forces arrives with is the American flag. They live for it. They die for it. It flies over their bases and their cemeteries. If you don’t like it… fuck you. We’ll take our football, our flag and turn off the lights on the way out.

On a lighter note and an attempt to smooth things out with the Haitian Amicis, personally I think it would be a good idea to annex Haiti. If there is one thing this nation needs and Haiti can provide it is more voodoo. Aside from that I’m kind of drawing a blank. Couldn’t you just see Nancy Pelosi with some funky Erykah Badu headwrap and a cigar throwing a handful of chicken bones on the podium and declaring, “The spirits have spoken. Obamacare has passed.”

This could also work out well for the Bamster in 2012. You know he wouldn’t dare try that Hope and Change shit again. He needs something catchy, maybe a rap ditty.

Red white and blue.
Tried and true.
For me and you.
Roll on your back.
Roll on a log.
Took me six months,
To pick out a dog.
Doobie doobie doo.
(apologies to Frank, but it might sway some of the old Eye-talian voters)

Have a good week, buddy-boy

Some more kind words on Johnny Porno:

“Johnny Porno is exactly that – a hard man chasing the tail that won’t pay for the tears. By first reminding us of William Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet and then translating its rhetorical question into the vernacular of our romantically challenged times, Stella’s way with words does the near impossible; it finds a way from pornography to romance in the paradox of power and impotence peculiar to all of us: ‘Fuck’s in a name?’” — Len Wanner. Len Wanner was educated at University College Dublin (BA&MA) and the University of Edinburgh where he is working on his Ph.D.

Full review here at our new feature to Temporary Knucksline, a link to a separate blog for reviews only.

Johnny Porno Trailer:

Pre-order Johnny Porno here.


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