Charlie's Books

Charlie's Books
Buon Giorno, Amici!

Our motto ...

Leave the (political) party. Take the cannoli.

"It always seems impossible until it's done." Nelson Mandela

Right now 6 Stella crime novels are available on Kindle for just $.99 ... Eddie's World has been reprinted and is also available from Stark House Press (Gat Books).

Friday, April 16, 2010

An Update ... Booklist Preview of a Review ... Somebody Dies on JP ... Slip/Fall ... Ali G ... The Gambler ... DOC Says ...


The DOC has informed me of a message he received from amazon:

Hello from

We're writing about the order you placed on January 25 2010 (Order# 002-_______). Unfortunately, the release date for the item(s) listed below has changed, and we need to provide you with a new delivery estimate based on the new release date:

Charlie Stella "Johnny Porno"
Estimated arrival date: May 03 2010 - May 07 2010

We apologize for the inconvenience caused by this delay.

But since yous are already here anyway ... how about a followup to The Gambler?

Picking up where we left off with The Gambler ... English Professor Axel Fried explains Dostoevsky’s The Gambler; that “desire is life” and that 2 & 2 = 5, “all athletes and poets know that. It’s their secret connection ... they know that two and two are five.”

— Knucks


Booklist Preview a Review to appear in the May 1st Review.

Don’t be fooled by the title - it’s just a gangster moniker. Elmore Leonard fans are going to love Stella’s entirely original contribution to the slice-of-criminal-life genre, down-and-dirty division. After the release of Deep Throat, the low-budget porn flick starring Linda Lovelace that captured the hearts and genitals of a nation, as well as making a substantial amount of cash, the Mob suddenly realizes that the legal situation in 1973 makes “fuck movies” viable and highly marketable to the masses. It’s no longer necessary to show them in rented warehouses. So enter entertainment purveyor and bagman John Albano, soon rechristened “Johnny Porno,” and a cast of gangsters all recruiting “talent” and following the money. This is the seventh novel from Stella (Mafiya, 2008), who has made the underside of the New York underworld his home.—Elliott Swanson (Booklist)

Speaking of Reviews’s Somebody Dies on Johnny Porno. Here’s a brief summary of the review:

“Based on my experience with Johnny Porno — I haven't read his other books but plan to remedy that soon (Charlie Opera is $2.00 on Smashwords) — I must say that Charlie Stella is one of the best writers the crime genre currently has to offer. He's a natural wordsmith, putting down the way people really talk in a way that still reads smoothly — not an easy task. The fact that Stark House Press, who previously focused on reprinting "lost" pulp novels, chose Stella as their first original author — after author Ed Gorman recommended him upon reading the manuscript — says a lot about his peers' respect for him.”
>— Craig Clarke (Somebody Dies)

Back pains ... thank God for those reviews ... the ulgy Knuckster took a fall early this morning. You know you’re getting old when the pain goes from your back to your toes. So much for all that aerobic stuff I was doing. As it happens my gym closed (AGAIN) for renovations (talk about a fugazy operation) and I wouldn’t have been able to go for another week anyway. It’ll probably be more like two weeks before I get to work out again.

I'll say it before DOC does, that picture needs another 100 pounds or so to be accurate.

Ali G and his main man, Patrick Boooochanon ...

The Gambler ...
one of my top 10 movies of all time (also recommended by Dave Gresham way back in the day) ... James Caan and Paul Sorvino. You want GREAT dialogue? This is the best dialogue I’ve ever heard in any movie. And Mahler’s Titan as background music throughout the movie is god damned PERFECT. Caan plays an English professor from a wealthy Jewish family. Caan has a bad habit. Sorvino is his bookie. Classical music abounds.

“Forty-four thousand dollars, Axel,” Sorvino tells Caan. “It ain’t just numbers.”

Trust me, amici, it ain’t.

What a great movie ...


There’s been a one week delay in printing of Johnny Porno. It will be released next week.

Pre-order it (Johnny Porno) here.

And the DOC says ...

Okay, Chaz, we get it.

Johnny Porno is a great book. However, if I have to read another glowing review of it my head is going to explode. Just to shut you up, even I bought 2 copies, and I normally just clip them from your bookcase. To wrap this up, I am including several additional reviews that you have somehow forgotten to include.

Bill Clinton: I loved Johnny Porno. It gave me wood, if you know what I mean. I would suggest that every American male buy several copies because after a while the pages are hard to separate. I can say unequivocally that reading JP is better than sleeping with the Secretary of State. Trust me.

Sarah Palin: Another dirty book from Charlie Stella? You betcha!

Michelle Obama: Charlie’s book reminds me of my garden. He starts with a single word and that grows into a wonderful novel. Just last week I was photographed planting seeds in my White House garden. This week we harvested 25,000 pounds of food to feed America’s poor. For the second time in my life I’m proud to be an American.

Elmore Leonard: So what now, people are going to start saying that I write like Charlie Stella? Screw the fat fuck!

Richard Simmons: That a skinny person hidden inside that ginormous body could create something so wonderful just makes me want to cry. I love you Charlie.

Nancy Pelosi: Charlie’s book is like my health plan. After you buy it, then you’ll find out what is in it.

Salvatore “Sally Sweaters” Moscarelli: I have no foreknowledge of this alleged Mafia to which Mr. Charlie Stella allegedly refers.

Barak Obama: Writing crime stories is easy. Try writing two auto-biographies when you haven’t actually accomplished anything.

Your pal,