And then there are these nuts …

Amici:


The last few days we spent relaying the FACTS of President Fredo’s administration, but let us not forget these nuts …

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

Some of yous ask why bother calling for a third party (whether it be Ralph Nader, Ron Paul, socialists, communists, John Birch, etc.)? We say because between the inept Democrats (who can’t get anything done) and the lunatic Republicans (above), Knucksline says we better have another choice or else.

Curmudgeons in 2012 … because “they’re so cranky, they’ll annoy the inept and the whackos into making the changes we seek.”

Have a great weekend!


—Knucks

The New Voice of Right Wing America … the Rock of the Week ...Pharmaceuticals ... DOC says ...

Amici:

Pharmaceuticals ... If our post yesterday wasn't enough proof that this administration isn't doing much different than the last, how's this: Yesterday the Senate voted down a chance for all of us to purchase pharmaceutical drugs from outside the US&A at a cheaper price. One more victory (or defeat) for the Barrack O-Bush administration? This amendment also fell short of the 60 votes needed for approval; the tally on it was 56 in favor, 43 opposed.

Let’s see ... there are currently 58 Democrats, 40 Republicans and two Independents (Joe Lieberman and Bernie Sanders, both of whom caucus with the Democrats? Well, okay, let’s scratch Joe on this one—he’s a total sellout to anything health care related). But Sanders, as we know, is a self-described democratic-socialist (God bless him).

But no matter how you slice it, amici, it’s yet another check mark on the Saturday Night Live box score of President Fredo’s lack of accomplishments.

“On broader Healthcare issues, Obama promises in his manifesto that he will lower the costs of prescription drugs and will repeal the ban that prevents government from negotiating with drug companies.”

Still don’t think we need a third party to save us from two versions of the same political scam?

The New Voice of Right Wing America ... Last week on Sixty Minutes, President Obama talked tough. “I did not run for office to be helping out a bunch of fat cat bankers on Wall Street.” He went on to say: “Well, let's see … You guys (Wall Street Bankers) are drawing down $10, $20 million bonuses after America went through the worst economic year that it's gone through in decades, and you guys caused the problem. And we've got ten percent unemployment. Why do you think people might be a little frustrated?”

So what does Mr. Obama/President Fredo do two days later?

From last night’s Washington Post: The federal government quietly agreed to forgo billions of dollars in potential tax payments from Citigroup as part of the deal announced this week to wean the company from the massive taxpayer bailout that helped it survive the financial crisis.

The Internal Revenue Service on Friday issued an exception to longstanding tax rules for the benefit of Citigroup and the few other companies partially owned by the government. As a result, Citigroup will be allowed to retain $38 billion in tax breaks that otherwise would decline in value when the government sells its stake to private investors.

Now, can one of yous please confirm for me whether Barrack Obama is a Republican or a Democratic? The one note boring samba that it has become here at Knucksline (and other places—see Huffington Post for any number of Bush-Light/Bush-Heavy decisions), seems justified in light of how the Democratic Party gave George Bush (and Wall Street) just about everything he (and they) asked for before and after they (Democrats) had a majority in Congress and why now that they have a veto proof majority in Congress, Democrats continue to vote the Republican line of tax breaks (and just about everything else—see Afghanistan troop escalations, Blackwater budget increase, watered down healthcare that guarantees insurance companies more customers (and that Howard Dean says should be scrapped), and, of course, we’re still in Iraq, etc.), etc., etc. ...

Back in my bleeding heart liberal/loyal to the Democratic Party at all cost days, I used to be amazed how anybody in my financial boat (or under it) could vote Republican. Why would they do that to themselves? Republicans are for the rich. Republicans don’t care about the little guy. Republicans are too eager to go to war with our kids. Republicans are for big business and big business only.

Okay, so yous tell me the focking difference now that this Democrat is President?

Frankly, I don’t know what has DOC’s panties in a bunch. This guy couldn’t govern more to the right with a gun to his head. Citibank gets to walk away from $38 billion in taxes after we had to bail them out? What the FOCK is that all about?

Clearly, Obama wasn’t ready for the job. He looks good on camera and he can speechify with the best of them, but that’s where it ends. We’ve now been disappointed by two Ivy League Presidents; Yale gave us President Moron and now Harvard has given us President Fredo. Here’s a thought … how about somebody from Brooklyn College? Or Katharine Gibbs or TCI (Technical Career Institutes) or a some Croupier school or one of the instructors from the Evelyn Wood school of speed reading or the American bartender academy (Knucks has a certificate from there). Or, as I’ve said many times in the past, how about somebody who can run a pretzel stand at a profit?

Or how about a haberdasher? That seemed to have worked pretty well once.

Harry Truman has always been my favorite President.

Last week Fredo gave himself a B- on Oprah for his first year in office. Knucksline gives him a big fat F. You know the reasons. What he contributed to the dismantling of labor gains for American workers with the two things he should’ve voted “present” on (the bailouts and his half-assed stimulus—which consisted of 1/3 tax breaks—how Democrat of him) remains unforgivable. What he’s done with the political capital he was handed after his inauguration and a clear Congressional majority is nothing short of a fiasco. He’s watching Americans continue to lose their jobs and homes while continuing to supply Wall Street with all the ammunition it wants (between flying around the world, of course). He gave them OUR money with the understanding that they’d lend it back and they haven’t. He gave them OUR money without protecting any of us and not only do they reward themselves with bigger bonuses than before the "crisis" (and for screwing up the economy in the first place and requiring US to bail them out), some of those FAT CATS didn’t even bother to show at his emergency meeting the other day.

Because they don't take him serious and frankly, neither should we.

We’re all getting shot by Wall Street assassins and Fredo, on cue, is fumbling the gun.

President Fredo he is.

Change we can believe in?

Change my ass.

The Rock of the Week ... down we went last week (my beloved new york state buffalo bills went and won another game--idiots--didn't anybody in Buffalo ever hear of Draft Picks?) ... so take the Aints over the Cowgirls in a good old romp ... because it's December and the girls just don't show up this time of year.

—Knucks

And the DOC says ...

Hey Chaz,

So now it's okay to call the Chosen One, Fredo? Thanks. I hope you didn't stumble getting off of your high horse. But at least we know that the horse must be relieved.

I do, however, object to your comparing Fredo to Bush. Bush may have spent money like a drunken sailor, but Fredo is spending like a teenage girl with her first credit card and trust me, I have first hand experience with this.

Yesterday, Fredo was given a bill to sign that would increase government budgets by 10% with an additional FIVE THOUSAND pork projects included. Cost of the bill... $1.1 Trillion! Suddenly, the Repubicans leapt to their feet and shouted, "With this economy we cannot continue to waste money on pet projects." With equal fervor, the Dimocrats stood and said, "By God, you're right. We too will cancel all of our pork spending."

The Bamster looked to the heavens and then at his brace of teleprompters and declared, "It's a good thing you have finally come to your senses. Throughout my campaign I told the American people that I would not sign any bill that included pork projects. That first bill only included 9,000 pork projects, so I let that one slip through, but I was actually going to be true to my promise this time."

At that point, both houses of congress dropped to their knees and recited the Lords Prayer. Fredo was a little slow to kneel, because at first he thought they were talking to him.

And then I awoke from my dream and both parties were snout-deep at the trough and Fredo had just pissed away another Trillion Dollars to make government even bigger. But fear not, we're only spending $3+ million to study "Surgery in Space".

Next week, Chaz, we should delve into the logic of how if we don't spend another Trillion Dollars on health care we will be bankrupt. Hmmm, spending money, you don't have, to avoid bankruptcy. Over the weekend, I'll have my daughter explain that to me again.

Hope and change, brother
Doc

One for Obama … The Tiger Tally … Travels with Charley … A Two-For … DOC says ...

Amici:

One for Obama ... here’s something we think President Obama is doing right, supporting charter schools such as those featured on 60 Minutes two weeks ago. Geoffrey Canada is the man behind the great success he’s made of a pet project that is yielding phenomenal results. A Harvard man that knows how to get things done and is getting them done, Canada will fire teachers, directors and porters who can’t get it done. He’s about success and refuses to accept failure. Compare his school’s progress to what the public school system produces and what you have is night and day. Kids get into the school by a lottery and when the drawing is held, the parents of the unfortunate ones who aren’t picked (and are doomed to a public education) are visibly upset (to the point of tears). Education is the key to any society/country’s success. Should Obama become a one and done president, schools like this one may not survive.

Mr. Canada has proved himself a one man wonder. He promises his kids that every one of them will go to college and he means it. Although he manages to fund his program with mostly private funds, there’s no doubt a less sympathetic political party could (and probably would) undo the great success accomplished in Harlem. This is a big deal and one reason Obama should do whatever he can to keep himself from being one and done .

The Tiger Tally ... it’s up to 12 and closing in on the Knucksline Over/Under fast …

Travels with Charley ... In 1960, shortly after fighting Hurricane Donna to save his sailboat moored in Sag Harbor, Long Island, John Steinbeck took off across and around America in a camper he’d named for Don Quixote’s horse, Rocinante. The camper was specially built for his trip In Search of America. This was a fun read from start to finish because the travelogue provides one of America’s greatest authors speaking to us directly through his pen rather than his characters. He’s also speaking to Charley (his pet French Poodle—the standard size) and several of the people from around the country he meets along the way.

Steinbeck claimed he wanted to see the country he had written about and he did so in the tiny camper so overstocked with provisions he had to have the tires changed after they blew out during the trip. He’d brought guns and fishing poles and booze and beer and Charley. The pooch was sick a couple of times during the trip and at one point Steinbeck had to take a four day break while Charley recovered at a vet’s office in Texas. Although his wife joined him twice along the way for brief overnights, Steinbeck eventually grew tired of the trip as he went through the South where he’d experienced some racial ugliness in New Orleans. It was a chance for the author to relate in his travel memoir a past memory of a black family he’d grown up with in Salinas, California and how there were never any lesser expectations of them than anyone else in the community. The hard working black family flourished, as did the children Steinbeck grew up with.

The book is broken into four parts and each is a joy to read. This one is highly recommended, if for no other reason than the fun of Steinbeck’s playful words and the exchanges he had with his pooch.

A Two-For ... A book Knucksline reviewed here back in October has made it to the Washington Post’s best of 2009 mystery list … the author, David Zeltserman, also made it to the same Washington Post’s 2008 list with his previous novel, Small Crimes. Dave is one of those unsung authors too often ignored by some of the circle jerkers in the business. It happens.

Zeltserman resides in Bean town and aside from the fact he’s a die-hard Patriation fan (and has been a spotter for coach Cheaterface stealing defensive signals against all three much better teams within their division), Zeltserman also has a black belt in the martial arts and has been known to hustle pool rooms across America.


—Knucks

and the DOC says ...

You have some 'splaining to do Lucy!

How exactly does Fredo get a point for a school that is paid for mostly by private donations? If you win the lottery you get an education and if you don't win you get advanced courses on running the deep fryer at Mickey Ds. The D.C. school system just handed out $15 million in bonuses and their reading scores are the 4th worst in the nation.

I would give the Bamster a point if he would fire the teachers who suck and hire new ones, but that might piss off his paid-for union voting block. Not to mention his "Safe School Czar" who thinks that all school children should read gay porn. Luckily, school kids can't read. Okay, I'll give Fredo a point for that.

Actually, I think that is how the new health care works as well. If you win the lottery you get the hip replacement. If you don't they give you a milk box with skate wheels on the bottom, so you can sort of roll around.

Man, I am getting sick of hearing about who Tiger Woods has been diddling. That is personal information and should only be a matter of interest for Tiger Woods himself and Mrs. Woods' squadron of lawyers.

I read "Travels With Charlie" when I was in high school. And yes, that was when we kept our muskets in the cloak room so that at noon we could go out and shoot our lunch. And yes, they actually did call it a cloak room. Good Lord, how freaking old am I?

Your colonial pal,
Doc

Letter from DOC … Just War … No More Kirkus …

Amici:

An Open Letter from DOC …

Keith Olbermann may have his “special commentary” and Bill O’Reilly may have his “talking points memo” but Temporary Knucksline has that wild and crazy curmudgeon from the FARRRR right, the DOCster ... and here’s an open letter from him to moi, Knucskline and all a’yous ...


Oh, Chaz,

I think I need an intervention. I almost did a terrible thing tonight. I almost blogged. Worse than that, I almost blogged at the New York Times!

I was innocently reading an article about the use of Blackwater employees by the CIA in the Middle East. Shockingly, they are not just being used as guards. They were actually supporting CIA missions.


Now, you know that I am not someone who is prone to sarcasm, but I was tempted to drop that information I discovered about gambling in Casablanca on the NYT. Then I got to the "Readers Comments" section.. Good God Almighty!

It seems every one of their readers was represented, because there were like 28 comments. 28 comments and Bush/Cheney was mentioned 112 times. And the outpouring of outrage and disgust and indignation and moral superiority just about made me gag. I will never again accuse you of having your panties in a bunch. Your panties might be a tad wrinkled. These NYT people are in full blown, atomic, ninja, panty bunch mode. This is "the crabs are gasping for air" panty bunch mode.

Needless to say, there was much talk about arresting Blackwater, the CIA and of course Bush/Cheney. (In NYT land "Bush/Cheney" is one word and I would imagine that most NYT readers have their computers programmed to print "Bush/Cheney" just by hitting the "B" key.)

So, my new plan is to arrest Blackwater, the CIA, the entire military and of course Bush/Cheney and have the 28 readers of the NYT put their flip-flops and Birkenstocks on the ground in Iraq and Afghanistan. Let's see how the uber-conservative Taliban reacts to our new capuccino drinking, clove cigarette smoking, Keith Olbermann groupie, all gay army strike team. I think a week or two of their self-absorbed, catty, holier than thou, liberal wienie banter will have those mullahs packing up and moving to Jersey. Then we could just round them all up at the falafel stand in Patterson.

Do you think I might be onto something here?

Your pal,
Doc

PS: I would love to go to your Christmas Party, but if anyone wishes me "Happy Holidays" I will need to have the Jennster shoot them. I would also like to know what your arrangements are for dealing with the accumulation of deadly CO2 gases.

I'm not paying any carbon taxes to Al Gore! He'll just buy more food with it.


TK Editorial comment regarding above ... President Nobel Peace Prize actually upped Blackwater’s Budget (if you were looking for change—there’s one example) ... so maybe when dealing with Bush-Cheney from now on in regards to anything Blackwater or CIA, perhaps Obama needs to be added to the mantra: Bush-Cheney-Obama.


Bellum Justum ... Speaking of the Nobel Peace Prize, while Knucksline found President Obama’s peace speech eloquent as usual, we found the concept of a “Just War” used after 8 years of war against a rather nebulous enemy (we know they’re out there, all reportedly 100 of them) a bit dramatic and spurious. Should the entire nation state of Afghanistan suffer for our defense of a corrupt regime? Doesn’t that kind of negate the “Just” part of the formula?

What makes it more difficult to swallow, quite frankly, is the lack of questioning being done about what has now become Obama’s war. Except for Bob Herbert, a New York Times columnist quoted here at Knucksline often in regards to anything Afghanistan related, including a polite criticism of President Obama and his “tragic mistake” of sending an extra 30,000 to war there, we’re not hearing any of the questions that quite rightly plagued the Bush administration about both wars.

If we’re going to fight a war for a just cause, why aren’t we invading Darfur, North Korea and/or Iran?

And what’s up with the nation building?

And, while we’re at it, what’s up with Blackwater? Why the increase in their budget?

If Al Qaeda is going to be our evil enemies forever (and we’re not suggesting they won’t be), what happens if in two years after we leave Afghanistan (assuming we ever leave), they return? Do we go back for that Just Cause?

Hey, you know what? Enough already. Bring the kids home and lets tend to business here. And please, President Obama, feel free to start initiating some of that so-called socialism (since wingnut loons like DOC are accusing you of it anyway). You’ve rescued Goldman Sachs and AIG ... now it’s time to rescue all of us. That would be a more than welcomed change.


No More Kirkus Reviews ... On a VERY sad note for the ugly one ... one more publishing collapse in an industry beset with collapsing, Kirkus Reviews is no more. Kirkus had been more than kind to the fat one (that Charlie Stella character). Known as the tough one on the reviewing block, Kirkus gave Stella two starred reviews (Eddie’s World & Shakedown) and a bunch of very good reviews with just one so-so review. They did not review Mafiya.

From New York Entertainment ... The Pepsi to Publishers Weekly's Coke when it comes to prepub press, Kirkus was always known, to the booksellers and industry reporters who relied on its write ups of forthcoming titles, as the cranky one. Where PW went soft for a big name or a fresh face, Kirkus could usually be counted on to demolish the overblown writers, and to be unsparing when it came to first novels by photogenic young things. A rave in Kirkus was truly a prize; a hatchet job was an easy enough excuse for a bookstore owner, besieged by the sheer volume of books being flogged, to move on.


—Knucks

In Memoriam:


“And so the dance along Mean Street begins, as complex as it is violent and brutal. Bobby will have to step lively to keep from paying the piper. With his fifth entertaining entry in the gangster follies, Stella earns a place among the most readable writers in crime fiction." – Kirkus *Starred* Review


"Fresh, fast and darkly-funny. A sure-footed debut from a writer with a spare, no-nonsense prose style who can make you like characters you think you shouldn't." – Kirkus *Starred* Review

My Mom … Over/Under … Dirty Ref … Life or Death … Rock of the Week ... DOC says ...

Amici:

Charles & Leslie ...

The Nanster and Lola ...

The Phat Dad & Rigoletto ...

My Mom ... Sunday is Mom day and this past Sunday I was pleasantly surprised when just before we arrived so did one of two sons/three kids (the one speaking to me). Charles (not Charlie), his future bride (Leslie) and my granddaughter (Lola—Boston Terrier) were all there. It was also the one time I agreed to take Rigoletto (our super dog) for a visit and of course the Principessa Ann Marie had to hold Rigoletto on her lap the entire time because Lola has more energy than a case of Manhattan Specials (espresso coffee soda). Usually when I visit, I try and get my mom’s low blood pressure up a notch (if yous think I’m a ball breaker on political blogs, come spend some time with me at mom’s house). The best way to increase her blood flow is to break her shoes from the time I get there until a few minutes before I leave (when seeing how much pain she’s constantly in eventually wears even me out).

Mom has a corner shelf with 4,010 religious statues I try and move around every time I’m there to make her just a little crazy.

“Hey, what’s St. Jude doing with Mary over there?”

“Never mind,” Mom says.

She always starts off relatively sweet.

“Is that St. Anthony smoking a joint?”

“You’re a sick one,” she says. “You know that, right?”

“Seriously, ma, you shouldn’t put a Lady Ga-Ga next to St. Peter like that.”

“A cappa fresca,” she says. “You got a clear head. Who the hell is Lady Ga-Ga?”

“I’m telling you, it looks like Lady G is going down on him.”

“Now that’s enough already,” she says. “Go shit in your hat.”

My mom ... she turns 80 the day after Christmas. She’s the bestist.

Over/Under ... Tiger is on a roll ... 9-10 tomatoes are out of the can ... you gotta figure a couple are holding out for the bigger bucks ... screw the Vegas line, Knucksline is setting the O/U at a baker’s dozen (13).

Dirty Ref ... former disgraced NBA referee Tim Donaghy upchucked his lungs on CBS’ 60 Minutes the other night but his revelations were neither earth shattering nor believable. The truth of the matter is HBO’s Real Sports with Bryant Gumbel’s feature story on one of Donaghy’s cohorts, James Battista was much more credible. What was interesting about Donaghy’s CBS story (and how the FBI’s man seemed to back it up) was his belief that “making an example of a player” in a game by calling fouls on him (or letting that player take a beating without calling fouls against him) was not influencing the game for the sake of the money he (Donaghy) had already bet on the same game; the inference being that referees were calling a dirty game for personal reasons rather than financial gain.

Yeah, okay, but we think that extra couple grand might've influenced a couple calls against some other players he didn't personally have it in for ...

I once refereed a dopey adult flag football league for extra coin and there were at least half a dozen fights a year between players and referees so I totally understand (and believe) that refs do hold a grudge against certain players or coaches who spend the afternoon giving them crap. I sure was guilty of some game time retributions (out of bounds, pass interference, etc.). It is simply human nature (for most humans).

Still, that doesn’t come close to making Donaghy’s story square. He ultimately put himself in the victim seat and blamed those wild and crazy Eye-talians (the mob made him do it). In the Real Sports version, Battista, it was revealed, never cut a deal and eventually did his time. Donaghy did cut a deal. My feeling about those cutting deals is pretty rigid; I don’t believe a word out of their mouths.

The bottom line is David Stern, the commissioner of the NBA, seemed not only anxious to make all this go away since it started, he refused an interview with Gumbel, Real Sports and CBS. One of Donaghy’s accusations was that refs were “tipped off” as to league preference once the playoffs started (i.e., bigger market teams getting the calls). Stern insisted Donaghy was just a rogue ref (imagine the porn parody possibilities hooking him up with the Sarah Palin look alike?). All we know is that fantasy connected things like this happen a lot more often than guys like David Stern will ever admit. Like petty retributions for taking verbal abuse for two-three hours at a clip, mean green has a lot more to say than any referee or player code of ethics ever will. And if you think this clown Donaghy is the only “rogue” ref out there (to include all sports), you probably think Pete Rose was the last baseball player to place a bet while still active.

Life or Death ... most of us have seen the Youtube video of the above piece of shit mugging a 102-year-old woman. In it he throws a few punches at the woman and eventually knocks her down. Apparently he made a profession out of mugging older women (at least three we know of) and a Queens criminal court sentenced him to 75 years in the joint (effectively, the rest of his life). Now, we don’t know about yous, amici, but the Curmudgeon Party thinks paying the freight on this loser for the next however many years it takes for him to die is kind of obscene.

Exactly, we say whack him. How uncivilized that would be some of yous might ask, but we say it’d be no more or less civilized than accepting a Nobel Peace Prize and then sending 30,000 more U.S. troops to a country that has suffered the wrath of 9-11 for more than 8 years; whacking the mugger above doesn’t come close to the innocents killed in collateral damage in Afghanistan and nobody at Knucksline is looking for (nor would we accept) a peace prize for it.

Fock this loser ... whack'em and have done with it.



Rock of the week ... Take the Kansas City Chefs over my beloved New York State Buffalo Bills ... after last week's performance (which we picked right), there's no joy (or hope) in Mudville any more. We suck.


—Knucks

And the DOC says ...

You're killing me Chaz,
Okay, you're a guy who loves his mom, his kids and his dog. What happened? You couldn't find a picture of the American Flag or a pie? Although, I did find this picture of Rigatoni, back when he was "on the street".

Poor Tiger! I think the count is up to 11, but I think your pick of 13 is a little low. If I had blonde hair and a rack I would be waiting at the station when this money train screeched to a halt. I see the final count closer to 20, but a bunch of them never gave him more than change of a twenty.

Referees are corrupt/corruptible. Why else would the Bills miss the Super Bowl year after year? What about Casa Blanca? Ya think maybe there's gambling?

I wouldn't worry about the piece of shit who mugged the 102 year old lady. He took a couple of shots that weren't even necessary to get the purse. Even lifers without the chance of parole have mothers. I would give him a year before he has an unfortunate shower accident. I just don't want to hear that he is in isolation. He needs to mingle with his peers.

Good of you to ignore the Copenhagen Summit. News leaked out that the U.S. and U.K. planned on sticking it to the third world countries. Have no fear. On December 18, Fredo will be there and he will give 100 billion dollars of our money to any overseas rathole that "pinky swears" not to pollute.

Rock of the week: Okay, Chaz, one of Tiger's bimbos is tooling around in my Maserati and I am putting around Jersey in a rusted out Vespa scooter that only runs on one cylinder. I can only buy 6 packs, because with a 12 pack the freaking thing won't make it up the hill. Just admit you have no clue of what's going on. There is no shame there. You could still be president.

Have a nice week, buddy boy
Doc

Print the Legend … Hot Water Heaters … Tiger … Oh, Sarah … Sanctuaries … That 8% … DOC says ...

Amici:

Print the Legend … on July 2, 1961 Ernest Hemingway blew his brains out … or did he? Speculation about Papa’s death has been the obsession of some ever since. Through an ingenious set of scenarios that include a 1965 Hemingway Conference of academics in Ketchum, Idaho (where Hem died) where one professor (Richard Paulson) has come to interview the widow Hemingway (Mary) and has brought his Scottish, very pregnant wife (and a wannabe writer herself—Hannah), a rogue FBI/CIA lunatic (Donovan Creedy—a writer himself) with his own Hemingway obsession and our protagonist, Hector Lassiter (a longtime friend to Hem going back to their Italy war days, a writer and a definite macho man complete with his very own FBI tail), author Craig McDonald delivers the goods once again in this third in his Hector Lassiter series.

Prof. Paulson is out to prove the widow Hemingway is the one who killed Papa. Creedy is out to ruin Papa’s literary reputation and is using Paulson to get it done. Creedy’s FBI ties go way back in Hemingway time and are a part of Director Herbert Hoover’s paranoid attempt to discredit writers he found fault with over his 48 year career—Hemingway being at the top of his hit list.

The novel starts with an incredibly gripping first chapter (Hemingway’s last day) and then bounces back and forth through some of Papa and Lassiter’s past, Hoover (and Creedy’s) ongoing grudge match with Hem and always returning to present day 1965 and the days surrounding the conference (where Lassiter is the keynote speaker). There is enough subterfuge here to label this novel a spy thriller, but it is also a crime novel and something I like to call “documentary-like fiction” (fiction based on fact presented so authentically it might as well be a documentary) … but that would do a disservice to the author because McDonald is much more literary than the average jamoke writing crime novels these days. He has both a literary and journalist background (has published two author interview books considered the standard by which such revealing dialogues are measured—Art in the Blood and Rogue Males) and, as one might’ve figured out by now, McDonald is pretty much a Hemingway expert. His three Lassiter novels are smart, intriguing and loaded with Americana I can’t get enough of.

Print the Legend is the third in the Hector Lassiter Series (behind Edgar nominated Head Games and Toros & Torsos), but the Lassiter story began with a brilliant short story in the prestigious Mississippi Review, The Last Interview. It was immediately after McDonald’s first short story was published that I wrote him something akin to: “What the fuck are you dicking around doing interviews for? You’re a great writer.” As it turns out, McDonald is a superb writer and well on his way to the top of a very competitive writing world.

Most of yous know I refuse to provide spoilers (I want yous to READ), so don’t expect any here. Suffice it to say, for those interested in anything Hemingway, the history behind much of his life, the times, the people around him (including those out to malign him), his death and what came after, the Hector Lassiter series (all three books) are a must read. For those interested in good, smart writing, ditto. For those interested in a wild ride that transverses time and continents, ditto again. And for those looking for something that will not only enlighten, but will provide some genuine background of what government can (and often will) do to those it fears, Print the Legend, as quoted by best selling author Michael Connelly (on the cover), is indeed “an epic masterpiece.”



Hot Water Heaters … Yesterday toward the end of the work day, Knucks received a frantic email from The Wife. Something to the effect: “Tim said there’s no hot water and a flood in the basement. We need to go grocery shopping.” Now, what would one (hot water heater) have to do with the other (need to go grocery shopping)? Translation: You have to stay home tomorrow and wait for the plumber to repair the hot water heater, but we’re short on food supplies so don’t eat everything in the house.

I have this problem when I’m home, amici … it has to do with the proximity of the refrigerator to my writing room; there are no land mines between the two.

Tiger ... oy-vey, vey iz mir ... imagine the rest of this poor SOB’s life? Okay, he’s got more money than God, but soon he’ll have to share it with not just his wife but every woman he’s slept with who can prove it. Tiger, Tiger, Tiger ... what were you thinking? Of course I’m not talking about the tails he’s been chasing but that he thought he’d never get caught. Something tells me he’s been paying all along (for the silence) and that there must have been a mutual agreement that as soon as the secret was out, bada-boom, bada-bing, so was the extortion checkbook.

We actually do feel for the guy ... he won’t be able to screw a light bulb from now on without somebody keeping close watch. And one can only imagine how many women out there he’s been with who had the sense to make sure they could prove it (being clever capitalists). I’ll tell you this much, the guy may have it all when it comes to Golf, but between what his wife will put him through (before and after she hires some sharp attorneys) and how he’ll be hounded outside his home, I wouldn’t want to be this guy no matter how much he’s worth.


Oh, Sarah ... she says: "experts" & their latest shenanigans. Thank God "Climategate" truth is being revealed! If the GOP winds up with this broad running for President and the Curmudgeon Party doesn’t make it to the big dance, I’ll have to hold a gun to my head (and not vote socialist or Nader or Martian Party) and vote for the lighter version of Republican (which, as it turns out, is your standard Obama Democrat). We at Knucksline feel pretty sure about one thing going forward: If Sarah Palin is for it, we’re probably dead against it ... including that increase in troops to Afghanistan (where President Bush-Light has suddenly found so many “friendlies” on the other side of the political aisle--must be what he meant by inclusive government).

As it turns out, hot (but dumb as nails) Sarah Palin is just like all those Washington elites after all. The “principled one” tends to flip-flop, too …

Sanctuaries ... the Pakistan sanctuaries the Taliban is said to be using brings to mind what had happened in Cambodia during the Vietnam war; how what had started out as Operation Breakfast and eventually ended as Operation Menu, an attempt to cut-off NVA soldiers using hit and run tactics against our troops in South Vietnam along Cambodia’s border quickly became an obsession during which, (according to William Shawcross’ Sideshow, a book I had used for a Political Science paper back in the day), more bomb tonnage was dropped on (like Pakistan) the neutral state of Cambodia than we dropped on Japan in all of WWII. The result from our massive bombing of Cambodia resulted in the Khmer Rouge, Pol Pot and the killing fields. We suggest President Obama tread lightly when poking our nose (and bombs) into Pakistan. Dropping bombs on people doesn’t always have the desired effect.

That 8% ... last post DOC made a great point regarding the makeup of President Obama’s cabinet: “I saw an interesting fact the other day. In most president's cabinets there are between 30-50% appointees from the private sector. The democrats tend to have the lower numbers and the republicans tend to have the higher numbers. Can you guess how many cabinet members the Bamster has appointed from the private sector ... 8%. He has surrounded himself with academics and community organizers. No wonder nothing ever gets done! These are not people who respond very well to, "And have that up and running by Friday, or else." They don't "do" things. They discuss things. If they are real over-achievers they might write a paper. If the kids can't read by June, they give them diplomas anyway and plan to re-address the issue in September with a new batch.”

DOC and I first met at a flourishing marketing research firm that had been sold to an international conglomerate a few years earlier. The new guys running the ship were the same sort as the 92% Obama has surrounded himself with (mostly academics with PhD’s) ... and while DOC went on long (cough, cough) lunch breaks and I did the weekly count (at my desk) for the fantasy connected bookmaking office I was with at the time, the academics proceeded to run the company into the ground. True story. Between the CEO and the geniuses he personally hired, friends of friends from the academic world, it wasn’t long before the company was “downsized” into near oblivion. The academics were all bright enough people, but having never “worked” for a living many of them were stuck in theory and losing out to others who knew the empirical ropes (the ones who had worked themselves up through the ranks). That’s not to say that academic types can’t get it done, but it is a scary thought when everybody who jumps into the van is a theorist with six sets of academic degrees and not a one of them knows how to drive.


Next Knucksline review: John Steinbeck’s Travels with Charley.

—Knucks

And the DOC says ...

Chaz, it's time for you to move on.

Sarah does not want you to be her love monkey or whatever it was that you were proposing and this retribution of yours is unseemly. I have heard that Nancy Pelosi is available, but she is used to screwing 300 million people at a time. I don't know if she is into that one-on-one stuff.

I loved that ABC clip with the giant "FALSE" rubber stamp coming down on Palin's face. Do you have any other clips like that where they use that "LIAR" stamp on anybody else? Perhaps on an actual elected official. I imagine not.

You'll be pleased to hear that I have started incorporating Obama's war policy into my private life. This morning at 10:00 I dropped my truck off at the repair shop and I gave the mechanic an hour and a half to fix it. At 11:30 I went back to the garage and the mechanic gave me my bill, my car keys and a big freaking box of parts. Maybe tomorrow you can stop by the house and we can figure out where to put them.

Although, I have a pretty good idea where I would like to put them.

Get help, Chaz.
Your pal,
Doc

Gotti Jr. IV ...Afghanistan ... CEO’s … Beating dead horses … Anchor of the week ... DOC says ...

Amici:

Gotti Jr. IV ... well, perhaps those so anxious to prosecute the “alleged” terrorists in a federal criminal court should think twice about the possible outcomes. There’s nothing quite like slam-dunk cases … obviously our fantasy connections are glad to see the government's case (made by giving “deals” to convicted and other “alleged” murderers) has fallen apart once again.

Was it justice? Well, if you believe in the system …


Afghanistan ... it is “vital” ... “necessary” ... “urgent” ... but not enough to send the 40,000 requested. We don’t think the war in Afghanistan is worth spit and that between the two wars and the countless innocent lives being extinguished and/or maimed on all sides of the equation (because imagine having bombs rain down on our heads daily), enough is enough. We think this was a bad political decision the President will regret and one he won’t be able to speechify his way out of (whether it is in 3 years or 7). We turn once again to Bob Herbert’s column (the 2nd one in a few weeks) in the Times yesterday regarding how maybe Obama needs to be strong about this particular issue and back away from what politicians say to get elected. Some liberals feel enthralled at Obama’s sticking to his guns on this one. Have they suddenly grown accustomed to nation building and/or defending corrupt regimes?

CEO’s ... last post, that wild and crazy DOC went after Knucksline for our feeling that unions remain necessary (not a necessary evil—but necessary so long as we maintain a capitalist economy and the government big business runs for its own purposes). What we continue to find so hard to understand from those on the right is how they can ignore (and promote) the corporate greed and absurd salaries/bonuses of CEO’s while getting their panties bunched up over the comparative miniscule benefits a union offers the actual workers behind the absurd salaries/bonuses (i.e., the ones who actually do the work).

Let’s take a look see (According to Forbes ... their rank/name/company and $’s in MILLIONS):

1 Lawrence J Ellison, Oracle = $192.92
2 Frederic M Poses, Trane = $127.10
3 Aubrey K McClendon, Chesapeake Energy = $116.89
4 Angelo R Mozilo, Countrywide Financial = $102.84
5 Howard D Schultz, Starbucks = $98.60 (a Canarsie boy)
6 Nabeel Gareeb, MEMC Electronic Mats = $79.56
7 Daniel P Amo,s Aflac = $75.16
8 Lloyd C Blankfein, Goldman Sachs Group = $73.72
9 Richard D Fairbank, Capital One Financial = $73.17
10 Bob R Simpson, XTO Energy = $72.27

Can anyone really be worth $192.2 MILLION dollars a year? Can anyone actually work that hard? Assuming he works 10 hours a day 6 days a week and has 4 weeks off a year (we know he's got it much better than that), isn’t that about $66,666.00 an hour? And isn't that a bit over the top? Or how about the genius worth $73.72 MILLION a year (at Goldman Sachs)--the one who claimed he's doing "God's work"? Isn’t that CEO responsible for bankrupting his company? Not to worry, he wasn't laid off ...

I’ll tell you what ... given the choice between any of the above and retiring after 25 years of union work at 80% of my salary, I’ll take one of the 10 above.

And remember, amici, our genius government (both Republicans and Democrats) didn’t bail out any of us. They bailed out some of the clowns above.

Beating dead horses ... While some so-called “liberals” find nothing better to do than point out Sarah Palin’s many foibles (or wingnuts in general), they have no problem ignoring the fact their chosen leader has yet to accomplish anything of substance. They’re so offended at their choice for Prez catching grief they’ve come to take issue with redundant Saturday Night Live parodies of the anointed one.

“Enough, already!” they decry. “Come up with something new!”

Ah, redundancy ... I’ve often been told my constant haranguing of our President is stale material ... that I’m often like the drunk at a party who keeps repeating the same old story when all the guy I’m boring to death wants to do is get the attention of the cute redhead standing in the corner (or something like that).

We find that interesting when all we read from the same group of “liberals” is the same old beating of the dead horses on the extreme right (as if it is Sarah Palin’s fault President Obama hasn’t been able to get his veto proof Congress to do a single thing for him outside of extending the Bush bailouts). We think her constant appearance on liberal blogs serves her purpose more than theirs: she’s caught a bunch of big fish who keep their eye on the wrong ball (her) while their guy ignores their existence. Like last night, for instance, when President Obama ignored the left once again and stepped up a pointless war for the sake of what exactly?

Why we sometimes refer to him as Bush-light.

Should you confront these “liberals” with FACTS, what happens is some hysterical ranting, name calling and, well ...

The conservative blogs I visit are a bit more refined and although I find disagreement there too (sometimes heated), they haven’t been nearly as intolerant as many on the left (but that is not meant as a generalization—it refers to those I visit only). The one exception I’ve found on the left is Barry Eisler’s blog (The Heart of the Matter) where the author himself guides the discussions; doing his best to point out when someone is getting a bit short or sarcastic and then suggesting a more tolerant tone. From what I can tell, it works.

It seems to me bloggers on the left are in a precarious position these days. Surely they aren’t happy with the centrist road Obama has taken and their ideological preference precludes them from dealing with his record (or lack thereof). They're answer is to attack the right, because who wants to hear from those on the right after having to deal with George Bush’s incompetence for 8 long years? It is a somewhat valid point ... up to a point.

Still, not all the Obama criticism is coming from the right. Saturday Night Live isn’t the only liberal barometer eliciting displeasure with the President. The Huffington Post has been at it too. So has Bill Maher, and, of course, wild and crazy Michael Moore and countless others.

And for those of us who refuse to run blind into the night (poking fun at the irrelevant extremists on the right), we do a double take at the so-called liberals who refuse to hold their guy accountable for anything. What we see is a never-ending finger pointing charade that facilitates the inaction of government and further enhances the status quo. They’re mantra is IOKIYAR (It’s Okay If You’re A Republican) ... juvenile nonsense that they can rally behind?

What these “liberals” continue to ignore is the following:

Carrie Prejean (another favorite of liberal bloggers to make fun of) has the same stance on Gay Marriage as their President (and their party of choice).

The now infamous private security firm, Blackwater: President Obama increased their budget over what Bush had allotted.

Iraq (“the wrong war at the wrong time in the wrong place?”) ... well, we’re still there.

Afghanistan (see above).

Fiscal Oversight of the markets ... more than a year after Wall Street's very successful extortion we’re still waiting for it (the oversight).

Closing down Guantanamo ... you guessed it ... still up and running.

Health Reform ... we’re still waiting for that, too, but nobody is kidding themselves about what we (the taxpayers) will get.

Big Business ... has done fine and dandy by this President (bailouts) while the national unemployment rate seeks a new high each passing month.

Whether the Republicans would do an even worse job seems to us at Knucksline a moot issue; the Democrats have control of both houses and the White House RIGHT NOW. They are the ones who can accomplish change (for lack of a better word), yet nothing of substance has changed. In some instances, we see it getting worse (Afghanistan).

The reason this President needs to get on his horse is obvious. Midterm elections may well make it more difficult to pass legislation. If things get bad enough, those same elections may strip him of his majority. Then what, Obama becomes Jimmy Carter II?

Usually it is the squeaky wheel that gets greased. Liberal bloggers poking fun at irrelevant figures on the right, while it may give them their daily dose of anti-Republican cheerleading jollies, it does nothing for the causes they supposedly support (like all those listed above President Obama has yet to address). Knucksline suggests those liberals fixated on Bush-Palin-Beck bashing try using some of their leverage on their president of choice rather than making it easier for him (Obama) to ignore them.

Speaking of SNL, here’s one we missed ...

The Anchor of the week ... oy-vey, vey iz mir ... if you bet both ends of Knucks’ reverse with the Y-E-T-S, Yets, Yets, Yets and his beloved New York State Buffalo Bills last week, you lost (BIG)… because both teams won outright. This week do yourselves a favor and start betting with the DOC (who has traded up for a Lamboughini—don’t you love it when the Irish buy Eye-talian?). We like the YETS over our BILLS in TORONTO (in a dome of all places on a Thursday night) ... because everybody knows ... when you have home field advantage like we should have in Buffalo in December ... only management from hell would make sure you play that game against a division rival in a heated dome in another focking country!

Oy-vey, vey iz mir ...

—Knucks

And the DOC says ...Okay, Chaz,

I realize that the horse is dead, but it's the only horse we have and it's crucial for the well-being of the world that we beat it. Let's make a strategy here. We'll beat the dead horse for 18 months more and then no matter what happens we will stop beating it. That will also allow time for you (the Generalissimo) to kick off your presidential campaign.

I saw an interesting fact the other day. In most president's cabinets there are between 30-50% appointees from the private sector. The democrats tend to have the lower numbers and the republicans tend to have the higher numbers. Can you guess how many cabinet members the Bamster has appointed from the private sector ... 8%. He has surrounded himself with academics and community organizers. No wonder nothing ever gets done! These are not people who respond very well to, "And have that up and running by Friday, or else." They don't "do" things. They discuss things. If they are real over-achievers they might write a paper. If the kids can't read by June, they give them diplomas anyway and plan to re-address the issue in September with a new batch.

We are so screwed!

I understand your outrage with the CEO payscales. Larry Ellison gets $192M and yet Bob Simpson only gets $72M. As the Bamster says let's spread the wealth. We'll level the playing field and pay them both $132M. You happy now?

Just for the record, Goombah, it is spelled L-a-m-b-o-r-g-h-i-n-i and it is a pimp car and I wouldn't be caught dead driving one. However, if your Lock of the Week streak continues, I could see a Bugatti in my driveway for Christmas.

Sorry, I didn't mean to offend your liberal weenie friends... I meant Winter Festival.

Your PC pal,
Doc