Tommy Red

Tommy Red
The Progressive Killer

Our motto ...

Leave the (political) party. Take the cannoli.

"It always seems impossible until it's done." Nelson Mandela

Right now 6 Stella crime novels are available on Kindle for just $.99 ... Eddie's World has been reprinted and is also available from Stark House Press (Gat Books).

Saturday, November 28, 2009

GOP Purity Test … World Prestige … President Fredo … The Fountainhead … Print the Legend … DOC says

Amici:


GOP Purity Test … Oy-vey, vey iz mir … the GOP has gone and shot themselves in the foot once again. They want their candidates to support the following: oppose President Barack Obama’s health care and cap-and-trade proposals as well as his stimulus plan; reject government funding for abortion; vote “no” on legislation to help unions organize; and support keeping the Defense of Marriage Act.

Okay, we’re against them on 4 of the above six and would want serious modification of the those we do support but knocking labor back another peg after the government sellout of the American worker (bailouts supported by both parties and something Republicans don’t get to make believe they weren’t a HUGE part of) is going way too far for Knucksline. Defense of Marriage is so silly at this point, we don’t want to address it (and we can only hope that Independents won’t either). We can live without cap and trade and would want serious oversight of future stimulus plans because we still aren’t happy about some of the pet projects Congress rewarded itself with at our expense. While we’re not sure about federal funding of abortions, because it remains a sticky issue for us, we continue to support a woman’s right to choose. Healthcare (after serious reduction of corruption) is a must, as is undoing all the damage these bailouts caused American Labor.

What continues to amaze me about the two major parties is how determined both seem to get in their own way and always at our expense. Deregulation brought about the crisis that has crippled the bulk of middle class Americans and the GOP wants to further inhibit workers from getting any form of a decent break. Unions didn’t form because big business treated workers fairly. While some unions are as corrupt as those who would corrupt them, for better or worse, there’s no way American workers can afford having their ability to organize precluded by legislation. While this government (both Republicans and Democrats) has done everything it could to bring labor back to the dark ages (including outsourcing our jobs, reducing benefits, taking away sick and vacation days, stopping cost of living increases, raises and bonuses for WORKERS (while they permitted CEO’s to stuff themselves with the same like pigs), any further union busting will result in a free-for-all employment situation whereby workers will be at each others throats for the sake of survival. You’d think the GOP would be thinking of ways to be more inclusive while Obama continues to accomplish nothing … but you’d be thinking wrong.


World Prestige … ooops, looks like the guys we’re fighting for weren’t as impressed with the Nobel Peace Prize as some of us might’ve thought. Afghanistan, where we’re currently fighting the “necessary” war and about to send 30,000+ more American troops to protect a corrupt government’s hold on the drug trade ABSTAINED when it came to joining our push for sanctions against Iran’s nuclear development (the six that abstained were Afghanistan, Brazil, Egypt, Pakistan, South Africa, and Turkey). Okay, so it was just a nonsense vote when all is said and done, but really, you’d think Afghanistan would at least make believe they give a fuck our kids are dying to protect their drug businesses.


President Fredo … I don’t like calling Obama President Fredo just yet but it is becoming more and more tempting. This week he’s flying to Denmark while Rome continues to burn. I guess because we all know how important climate control is while so many of us remain unemployed (and others of us await the dreaded pink slip). And who cares that we’re still bogged down in the “wrong war” and about to escalate the “necessary” war. The national health reform we were promised (along with all the rest of all that change rhetoric) is about to go through the dilution process that will guarantee the middle and lower classes nothing essentially different than what we have now while Wall Street continues to thrive to the tune of giving themselves bigger bonuses than they did before they extorted all of us.



And those banking regulation safeguards we were promised? Well, they remain another broken promise.

Fredo Corleone was a screwup due to what appeared (in Godfather II) to have been an infant illness. Obama, on the other hand, seems afraid to act with any authority from fear of being held to his words. So far he’s buried himself with campaign rhetoric he can’t (or has chosen not to) address (the wars, the change, etc.). His 130 “present” votes in the Illinois Senate may well have been prophetic. As Wikipedia puts it (regarding Fredo): In a pivotal scene in the novel and film, Fredo attempts to immediately retaliate after the attempted assassination of his father on a New York street by men working for drug kingpin Virgil Sollozzo (Al Lettieri). However, he fumbles with the gun, drops it, and is unable to return fire.


I sure hope our President enjoys his trip to Denmark.


The Fountainhead … The first of the epic Ayn Rand novels about individualism vs. altruism was a mostly interesting read that eventually turned lecture (the last 100 pages or so). It seems as though Rand couldn’t hold to the clever nuances she used to develop a few of the major players in the novel and eventually used a three page monologue by her protagonist’s (Howard Roark) nemesis (Ellsworth Toohey, a columnist and socialist) to convey what author Rand believed was the evil intent of statists (eventual power over all; that a population indoctrinated with the theory of serving a greater good would lead to slavery). It isn’t that Toohey wasn’t giving clear hints as to his goals throughout the novel, but getting hammered with it the way the reader is (so close to the end) may have served the author’s dramatic intent but it lost this reader when it most counts (so close to the end).

Roark is the author’s perfect man; he has principal he’ll place nothing above. He can’t be bribed or bought. He will never make himself a slave to others nor make slaves of others (except that isn’t so easy to accept no matter how much the author tried to explain how those who eventually worked for Roark seemed so overtly beholding to him). Perhaps with different motives (as I imagine Rand wanted for Roark), I saw him as the ultimate existentialist; a person living without any fear of any consequence for the sake of moving from one day (or goal) to the next.

A woman (Dominique) comes into his life early in the novel and a possible rape scene takes place (unless one is willing to accept the author’s inference that Dominique was the perfect woman for the perfect man and that she should live her life in subservience to him).

There’s a lot of implied subservience in this novel.

While Rand makes some valid points regarding objectivism and how man “should be”, she paints a somewhat dishonest picture of man as is; an arrogant picture that requires absolute intolerance of contrary opinions. Ultimately, it is this apparent requirement of subservience (still making slaves of so many, I’d argue) that sometimes made me uncomfortable.

Was The Fountainhead worth the investment in time it took to read (it is a lengthy read)? Absolutely, but I will be putting off Rand’s Atlas Shrugged for a few weeks while I read some other books on the pile.


Print the Legend … and the next book up is one I’ve been waiting a while for, Craig McDonald’s 3rd in his Hector Lassiter series; a revisit with some of the most fascinating Americana. Head Games was first, Toros and Torsos second and his new one about an investigation into Ernest Hemingway’s suicide (to be released in February 2010), promises to be the best of the bunch ... Print the Legend.



—Knucks

And the DOC says ...

And what kind of new weasel move is this, Chaz?

"I don't like calling Obama President Fredo". Oh no, you'll just post up pictures and videos of Fredo and wait for the old Docster to come in and take the bait. What the hell, you think, that old fool is probably on the Homeland Security watch list already anyway.

Nice going, old pal of mine.

And why is Fredo going to Denmark anyway? After "Climategate" it's pretty clear that all the global warming data is manufactured crap. Although, I have noticed that all the media coverage about it is from the U.K. Is this going to be another story, like ACORN corruption, that our mainstream media just ignores?

And I withdraw my question about why Fredo is going to Denmark. He would go to a midget, mud wrestling event if you would let him make a speech.

You're thinking that the Bamster is ignoring the unions? The head of SEIU has been to the White House 20+ times since January. For General McChrystal to get one audience he had to wrap a note around a brick and throw it through the window of the Lincoln bedroom.

There was a time when unions were necessary, but that time has passed. The unions of today are an example of the flea killing the dog they live on. To be successful, every contract has to stipulate that the worker work less and make more. This can't go on forever.

A worker starts today at GM at age 20. After 25 years of work he retires at age 45 and receives 80% of his salary for the next 40 years. Sorry, Chaz, the math just doesn't work. I'm not even calculating full medical for the worker and his family, for life. This system only lasted as long as it did because our parent's generation had the decency to retire at 55 and then have a massive coronary at 57. This might have been helped along by the government telling them that dairy products, eggs and red meat were at the top of the food pyramid and should be eaten every day.

On a personal note, Chaz, where are you getting these ideas from? You used to be normal... well, sort of. Have you become a pen pal of Susan Sarandon? Are you Tweeting with Barbra Streisand? If this is your mid-life crisis why don't you just buy a Harley like everyone else?

Your pal,
Doc

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Talk Radio … Chris Matthews … Coach who? … The Rock of the week …DOC's Turkey Day Story

Amici:


Talk Radio ... on the advice of our favorite right wing loon (the DOC), I gave a few listens to Mark Levin on the way to picking up the boss from her nursing class … this half a chrome dome I had pictured as a little dweeb yelling at his radio as if he’d just caught his oinker in his zipper.

Seriously, at the top of his lungs: “Don’t lecture me! Obama and his socialist agenda are ruining this country! What would our forefathers think?”

Let’s take this one at a time. Lecture? The person he cut off after one or two sentences hardly lectured him. Obama and his socialist agenda? If Obama is a socialist, then I’m one skinny MoFo. What would our forefathers think? Frankly, I think they’d be too busy watching porn, but assuming they were around today, I’d think they’d think it’s pretty cool to wipe oneself with toilet paper rather than leaves. It is irrelevant what our forefathers would think. 200 plus years have come and gone. Things have changed (like free internet porn) … seriously, enough with our forefathers. Laws are interpreted and then reinterpreted for a reason and depending on whose ox is gored, the interpretations are welcomed or abhorred. Get over it, Mr. Levin … it really is 2009.


Although it was fun hearing Imus again (not so much Imus but crazy Bernard McGuirk—I’m not sure if they still do the Cardinal routine (below), but that was some of the funniest shtick I ever heard (or saw when they were still on MSNBC). I heard about two minutes of Curtis Sliwa and turned that right off and I have been spared (working during the day) from listening to Limbaugh and Beck. The choice between 8-9, during my drive back to Manhattan to retrieve the Principessa, is Levin or Sports Radio—but both are boring. At least I can laugh at Levin’s losing his mind and ranting 1950’s propaganda). Obama a socialist? Try Bush-light.




Chris Matthews ... not to let the left off the hook, last night I watched Chris Matthews broadcasting in such obvious denial it was painful. He wanted to discuss Obama's first year accomplishments. He named our greatly enhanced prestige around the world as one accomplishment. Tell it to the 17.5% under and unemployed here at home, but whatever the rest of the world thinks of us, they sure aren’t showing it in supporting our absurd “necessary” war. Mathews also gave Obama credit for saving the country from a worse depression than 1929. After that one, I was starting to think Chris masturbates to an Obama doll. If he’s going to give credit for the bailouts, he forgot to mention the guy he continues to castigate throughout his nightly shows (as if Bush is still in office). Those unemployed and those about to be (including myself—I’m lucky enough to fall in both categories having already lost one job) aren’t anywhere near thinking either Bush or Obama saved anything other than Goldman Sachs, et al. I’m curious as to when Chris will discuss Obama’s failures (since he refuses to stop mentioning Bush’s failures). I had to turn off the television after the accomplishment nonsense because dealing with people in denial (and nobody is in more denial than liberal democrats insisting that Obama has a clue what he’s doing other than following Bush’s lead) is like pissing into a hurricane and I was wearing my favorite PJ’s and didn’t want to soak them.


Coach who? ... my beloved new york state buffalo bills are discussing their next head coach. Obviously, anybody worth two cents isn’t interested. Mostly because our organization sucks but also because the rumor is once Good Old Mister Wilson croaks, off go the Bills to Toronto, Canada. Now, I’m still debating speaking to that country and lord knows I’m not flying up there ever again (I had gone once for a crime writing conference and those were the longest three days of my life), but if the Bills become a Canadian enterprise, the tattoo gets removed and/or covered. Simply put, I disown the bastards. Bill Cower, a great coach, was discussed the other day but Cower’s response was a more than obvious “Thanks, but no thanks.”

I’m not a big Shanahan fan and I really doubt anybody can do anything with my Bills so long as the greedy Ralph Wilson survives. Until the issue of where they play once the old miser goes is settled, the likelihood of finding someone good to coach my beloveds will remain in serious doubt.


The Rock of the week ... well, amici, all good things have to come to an end sooner or later and last week, although my beloveds lost anyway, they managed to do it in the last few seconds of the game and thus covered the spread (for you nons out there who bet with my pick, you lost). My lock of the week is back to being a rock of the week. But that too will change: Take the Carolina Pantherless over the Y-E-T-S, Yets, Yets, Yets and reverse it with the Dolphinations of Miami over my beloved new york state buffalo bills and find the financial freedom you've been dreaming about.


Happy Thanksgiving to all of yous and yours!


—Knucks

And the DOC has a story for us all ...
Hey Chaz,

I thought I would tell you this story from back in my less than illustrious past. I occasionally hung out in Irish taverns, so naturally I played darts. One night in some strange gin mill, I was playing a game and stepped over a philosophical line in the sand. I'll be completely honest. I'm a "point shooter". It's completely legal. It's in the rules, but it evokes severe disdain from traditional dart shooters.

Having revealed myself as a point shooter the local denizens revealed that upon my exit they would open up an industrial-sized can of whoop ass on your best buddy. Being grossly outnumbered and particularly adverse to ass whoopings I called up my local bar and explained my predicament. After about 45 minutes, three of the largest, ugliest, tatooed individuals you've ever seen showed up at the saloon, gave me the old slap on the back and surrounded me. I had an over-the-road truck driver, an honest-to-god junk man and another compatriot that with one look you knew would not live another year without wearing a strait jacket. I bought a few rounds for friends and foe alike. My enemies got absorbed in other distractions, my goon squad and I left the bar and I lived to annoy uncounted people for decades to come.

Well, in August, General McChrystal made that frantic call to the home bar. It is now three months and Commander in Chief, Fredo is still ignoring him. The plans for tonight's state dinner for 300+ are progressing nicely, but McChrystal is sitting under-gunned in enemy territory. Bring him home or give him what he needs, but make the decision before the champagne corks start popping.

Happy Thanksgiving to you and the Amicis
Doc

PS: There was a sizeable amount of cash involved in the dart game, but I didn't deem that relevant to the spirit of the story.

Sunday, November 22, 2009

Pay-to-Play … Gotti Jr. IV … Why a duck? … Adelaide T. Stella …DOC says ...


Amici:


Pay-to-Play ... Earlier this month in Grove City, Ohio, high school student-athletes won a reprieve. At issue was whether a tax would be levied to support public school athletics or students would be required to pay-to-play. The vote had gone against athletic programs in the past with many feeling that during severe economic crisis and high unemployment, citizens shouldn’t be burdened with extra taxes for any reason (never mind track, baseball, football, etc.). Many others felt removing athletics from school was a guarantee that many student athletes, especially those from poorer school districts, would have little reason to stay in school; that losing athletics would lead to students losing an incentive to stay in school.

It’s a tough decision only if one chooses to ignore the waste this government incurs (at taxpayer expense) in the form of welfare and Medicaid fraud and it is absolutely criminal when one takes into account the fact this government (also at taxpayer expense) continues to pay rogue cadres of would be terrorists not to shoot at American troops in countries where we’ve chosen to initiate military operations. We’re paying-not-to-shoot at us and if that isn’t criminal, it is insane. Knucksline considers this a common sense issue that conservatives need to rethink in terms of a long term cost analysis. Aside from rocks, what do we get from these countries where we’re paying-not-to-shoot at us? The number of kids eliminated from the America dream because of budget cuts in athletic programs will multiply exponentially. Those most in need will not be able to pay-to-play, further unbalancing an already unbalanced playing field. In a country where CEO’s get to ransack an economy and reward themselves with multimillion dollar bonuses, surely we can find the relatively tiny amounts of dollars to keep public school athletic program affordable for all.


Gotti Jr. IV ... there’s a good chance the latest government prosecution of John Gotti Jr. will result in a hung jury (and probably a Gotti Jr. V). I’m not sure if the deals the prosecution made to admitted and convicted murderers require a Gotti Jr. conviction, but the deals themselves couldn’t be more despicable. In the case against Gotti Sr. the government let Sammy Gravano walk away from 19 admitted murders. Many on the street say nineteen is a very low-balled figure. Knucksline says 19 murders qualifies as serial killing and letting Gravano walk away (to start a drug business in Arizona for which he eventually was convicted and returned to prison for life) was obscene. Do we know if Gravano killed anyone in Arizona while he was at it—after being released for admitting to 19 murders? Would it really make a difference to the government?

The other thing the first three Gotti Jr. trials should show is how arrogant prosecution doesn’t always lead to their desired results; perhaps a lesson for those so anxious to try Khalid Sheikh Mohammed in a federal criminal court in New York City.


Why a duck? ... or (regarding the above and similar situations), why Ask me to pay? The disadvantage some Americans suffer (regarding poverty) negates arguments on the right that point to “how hard their ancestors had it” ... while everyone has the opportunity to pull themselves out of the shit, so to speak, the opportunities and access to those opportunities are far from equal. Those born into poverty suffer severe disadvantages and although there are “American success stories” that emerge from such poverty and disadvantage (success too often measured by eventual wealth), the number of those who fail to come close, whether the failure is personal or from circumstances out of their control, far outweigh the successful. The further into Ayn Rand’s The Fountainhead I read, the more upsetting her Objectivist theory becomes. Adhering to such selfishness renders my favorite of all Dickens’ lines null and void: "Mankind is my business."

If it isn’t, it should be.

Aiding the greater good neither promotes a lack of incentive nor precludes success (no matter how it is measured). It’s the right thing to do.



Adelaide T. Stella ... a year ago today (11-22-08) my sister passed after a nasty bout with cancer. My mother remains tortured by losing one of her children and today will be tough visiting with her. My sister taught English as a second language at Liberty High School, a New York City public school. The library at her school was dedicated in her name. My son’s t-shirt (picture above) was a dedication to his aunt. On his Your Cause page Charles wrote: I have dedicated the journey to my first ever marathon on May 17th in Delaware to Adelaide Stella (1953-2008). The passing of my aunt was the saddest day of my life and, in her memory I hope you will contribute any amount you can afford during these tough times to the American Cancer Fund.

The library plaque below:


—Knucks

And the DOC says ...

Hey Chaz,

So the whiney, little brats can't play sports unless they come up with the fazools. Tough! Welcome to the real world. Perhaps if they had something to sell they could come up with the cash. Mary Landrieu just sold a preliminary senate vote for $300 Million. Do you think that might save your sports program? Well, too bad, we don't have the money...we're broke! Only by the grace of God did Harry Reid find the $300M (obviously from his personal stash) to give to Mary. She says she'll want more when it comes to the final vote in 2 weeks, but the $300,000,000 will tide her over for now. William "cold cash" Jefferson must be pissed. He got less than half a mill in his bribe. That sounds like some kind of a racial thing to me. Call the Reverend Al.

Getting back to your point. I believe a sports program is part of an education program. The old "sound mind in a sound body" thing. If the school system doesn't have the bucks for a sports program I can only think of 3 reasons.

1) They're buying the basketballs at the same store where the govt. buys those $700 hammers.

2) The school board has started handing out Goldman Sachs type bonuses to teachers if at least 3 students in your graduating class can read.

3) Harry Reid gave it to Mary Landrieu.

Sorry I keep coming back to that Harry/Mary thing, but the way it was handled, in broad daylight, raising the initial $100M bribe to $300M when she held out, absolutely sickens me. They're not even bothering to hide their disdain for us anymore.

So there you have it Chaz. The corruption is so out of control, that we can't afford wiffle balls for Little Johnny, but we can spend a few trillion for a health care plan that no one really wants except for a handful of assholes in DC who won't be in it. Yet, you continue to throw your vote away. Yes, I know you call it "voting your conscience" I call it "farting in the windstorm". This is 21st Century America. You don't vote "for" someone. You vote "against" someone. We start off by voting this whole crowd out in 2010 and then again in 2012.

You don't even have to feel too bad about it because a congressman who serves 5 years gets a $125,000/year pension for life (plus cost of living raises). Five years gets you a pension for life? Sheesh! Who voted for a sweet deal like that?

Maybe one day, someone will come along that we can vote "for", but I don't see him coming out of this crowd.

Ponder this on your way to work, Sunshine.

Your pal
Doc

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

To Serve Them All My Days … Ayn Rand … 1 2 3 … Political Blogs … The Lock of the Week …DOC Says ...

Amici:


To Serve Them All My Days ... another one recommended for me to read (with extreme prejudice) by the old ball and chain.

R. F. Delderfield’s
well told account of what happens to a working class English lad who suffers shell shock after three years in the trenches of World War I ... he arrives at a private school searching for work ... a wise headmaster takes him on and a life of humane servitude begins. Between Pow-Wow’s (David Powlett-Jones’ nickname) war experiences, what he’d lived through as a child (when his father and brother were killed working a mine) and the various people he meets, the women he comes to love, the personal tragedies he suffers and the crazy world around him, the protagonist comes to realize his purpose in life was to teach (and eventually become headmaster himself) at the fictional Bamfylde School (supposedly in North Devon, in the south-west of England).

The book spans WWI into WWII and is a bit of a history lesson besides a very pleasant read. This one is long and it took me a full week but was well worth the effort.

Ayn Rand ... It was suggested by conservative bloggers that I read a few of Ayn Rand’s writings (novels and essays) and I’ve started with The Fountainhead. I’m only 150 pages in and although the extremes are clearly defined and somewhat exaggerated, I’m finding the read fascinating. Not so unlike some of my favorite existential reads (those of Camus and Sartre), but I have to admit that when I bought the books (I purchased two—this and Atlas Shrugged), I was embarrassed {insecure moron I sometimes am} to ask where her stuff was (based solely on an assumption that as a liberal I should be ashamed of myself for daring to read her). I had watched a few You Tube interviews with her {one with Mike Wallace from 1959 and another with Phil Donahue in her later years} and I found her mostly arrogant and intolerant). So far shame on me. I’m pretty sure I don’t agree with her underlying theme but for now the book is reading just fine and her characterizations have been intriguing. Stay tuned ...


1 2 3 ... the freckled one and myself weren’t anxious to see the updated, newfangled version of The Taking of Pelham 1, 2, 3 but there we were doing the pay-per-view thing last weekend. It wasn’t as good as the original with Robert Shaw and Walter Mathau but it wasn’t terrible; today we figure that means good enough to fork over the $4.99. Denzel Washington and John Travolta star in the remake and both do a fine job. It’s just hard to get beyond the cleverness of the original and the believability factor becomes an even tougher nut to crack when dealing with the modern version. Worth the fazools if you’re bored and there’s nothing laying around you’d rather read, but we’ll always suggest you read.


Wild & Crazy Buffalo ... what a town, amici ... last week the owner of the Tennessee Tuxedos went whackadoo and gave the finger (single and double versions) over and over to Bills fans and players from the visiting owner’s box. Bud Adams’ Tuxedos thrashed my beloved New York State Buffalo Bills (the start of another LOCK OF THE WEEK streak, by the way, Knuckfans). The 86-year-old Adams issued an apology a couple of hours later, saying he got caught up in the excitement of the moment. Well, we certainly know how that can happen so we forgive the old curmudgeon (and will be interviewing him for the curmudgeon ticket if he’s still around in 2012).

Until then, however, since Bud thought our fans and players are #1, one of us thought the same of him.

Political Blogs ... they’re loaded with passion, I can tell you that much ... and where there is passion, there is danger; one can easily be offended and/or offensive. Wars of words often drip with sarcasm, contempt and cruelty. They can also be revealing and interesting.

And, of course, they can be an enormous drain of one’s energy and an incredible waste of time. Smarter people than me restrain themselves from posting political, but like most vices that are bad for you, I’m too often right there in the middle of it.

I post comments on conservative and liberal blogs alike. I have been insulted and have insulted in return (that is not to suggest I’m always the victim—just sometimes—but I am certainly guilty of seeking verbal provocation and/or knockouts when responding to something I found particularly offensive). The finger pointing never seems to end and tolerance makes an abrupt exit.
As most of yous are aware, such blogging can get ugly fast. Person A says X. Person B responds with Y. Sides are taken. Person A says something he or she thinks is clever but Person B finds personally offensive. Person B then responds in kind. Person A has to go one better. Person B feels the same way. Name calling (if it hasn’t already started) begins ... threats (direct or indirect) get issued ... and what had started as a debate becomes chaotic childishness during which nasty things are said that aren’t meant but are very hard to forgive or take back.

Most times people apologize to one another and can move on. Sometimes, obviously, they do not or cannot. Most blog debates (for lack of a more accurate term) start off neutral enough. Obviously, if the blog itself is conservative or liberal and you’re coming from the opposite direction, you should be prepared for the attack. As soon as sarcasm and or insults appear, the knives are unsheathed. Unfortunately, also unsheathed are the anonymous cowards, male and female, who go for cheap shots they don’t want associated with their “good” name(s).

My advice (for what it is worth) to those who run blogs is this: If you really want “debate” on your site but aren’t interested in opposing viewpoints (especially from those who can go punch for punch with the best/worst of your sarcasm), either preclude those commentators you don’t want or ask them politely (or otherwise) in personal emails (or otherwise) to abstain from commenting; tell them to go away. If you choose to refrain from censoring commentators, then realize that you’ll be leaving yourself open to comebacks that may upset you; there will be commentators who ride you like white on rice and those same commentators will be ridiculed by those on your side of an argument. In that case (non-censorship) I highly recommend keeping oneself in check and doing one’s best to refrain from name calling and/or sarcasm. Nobody likes to be called names (whether it is dumb, stupid, elitist, wingnut, moonbat, ass hat, etc.). There’s really no percentage in insulting people, but once you do, you shouldn’t be shocked when it comes back in spades.

On the other hand, you can do what we do here at Knucksline (doesn’t that sound official?): we simply preclude comments. Although anyone is free to email me directly with a beef or otherwise (and many of you do), the reason I don’t have comments is to preclude debate; I have neither the time nor the desire to deal with whack jobs such as myself.

Which is why we have DOC, the superstar of Knucksline (it is in his contract that we repeat that (bold/italics) at least once every six months). DOC revels in poking fun at the ugly one. The ugly one thinks DOC is one of the best writers he knows and can’t help but laugh like a fool just about every time he reads that first response email from the right wing loon after each new post.

Besides, if we ever permitted public comments, never mind the acorns from the tree in our yard that continue to bombard casa stella’s deck, roof and gutters ... the political organization might burn the joint down.

What’s the moral to this story? In a nutshell: Proceed at your own risk.


The Lock of the Week ... that’s right, amici, when you win 4 out of 5 weeks in a row, no matter what that cranky SOB (spelled DOC) says, you’re hot. And right now, the ugly one is scorching. The Bills have begun to reorganize ... they fired the head coach ... T.O. went ballistic on the sidelines and didn’t bother chasing an intercepted pass (after it went through HIS hands) ... what does it all mean? The same two things that President Obama has accomplished so far ... Jack and Squat (see the new SNL skit below).

We’re playing the Jacksonville Feelines ... we’ll be getting points ... lay them and take the Jags in another route of my beloveds.

A Happy Birthday shout out to Charles (not Charlie) Stella ... the type-A Stella brat turns (I think) 27 on the 19th. He’s running marathons (and had one of his calves tattooed with the distance to prove it—you’d think they’d learn, amici). He works full time and is doing his MBA evenings while preparing for his wedding next 9-11 to the lovely Leslie Sharpe of Delaware. The two are living in sin in the meantime and have one beautiful daughter {my granddaughter} (Lola, a Boston Terrier who seems to have rocket fuel for blood).


—Knucks

And the DOC says ...

Well, thank you very much for the kind words, Chaz.
I just hope the amicis realize why I inherited this bully pulpit.
It's not just because I buy you food.
(And after your constant whining about the sausage
on the pizza,we know that is not going to happen again)

It's fairness!

It is because I can engage in debate with a fine, American, conservative, patriot and with some bottom-feeding, tree-hugging, panty-wearing, flag-burning, half-a-commie, left winger like yourself and treat both with equanimity.

It's having an open mind and treating everyone with respect!
I can walk to the manger where Sarah Palin delivered her first child then turn around and go down to the wine cellar and pet the nine headed hydra that guards the coffin where Nancy Pelosi sleeps. All the same to me!

It's yin and yang, buddy boy.
We're all children of God... even the liberal scum.

Peace, Brother
Doc

The DOC just wrote me regarding the video below:

Good job, Chaz,

Except you posted the response without the Joe Biden reference,
so the video doesn't make any sense. How do you find your way to work every day?

So, here it is, amici:

Hey Chaz,
You might want to put this after my schtick in case
some people don't remember.

The videos really jazz up the blog.
Doc

Saturday, November 14, 2009

Ground Zero II … The Curmudgeon ticket … Really Going Rogue … and the DOC says ...

Amici:


Ground Zero II … this one isn’t remotely funny. The idea that five pieces of shit will be brought to New York for a federal trial that can be held elsewhere pisses off Knucksline no end. Here's our position:

Whether this trial should be conducted by a federal criminal court or a military tribunal is up for debate. We believe it should be handled by the military, especially since they have been the ones responding to the attack on 9-11 ever since. It seems the Obama administration is handling this the way the Clinton administration did after the first attack on the World Trade Center; as a crime rather than an act of war. Many liberals argue everything the Bush-Cheney administration did regarding rounding up alleged terrorists was illegal (search and seizures, torture, etc.). They want to proceed to trial trusting the government’s case with what they assume will be untainted evidence (even after the confessions by torture, etc., are tossed out). Knucksline doesn’t see how that is possible. If they (the Bush-Cheney administration) acted illegally, why are we even bothering pursuing the case? Why aren’t these alleged criminals set free forthwith?

Ah, but there’s the rub (for liberals who argue it should be tried in criminal court). They not only want their cake (a trial by jury), they assume that the same alleged criminals that confessed after being tortured will be convicted. What happens if they're acquitted? We don't see how they can't be acquitted if everything Bush-Cheney did (by extension) was corrupt. What happens is some liberals get to eat their cake while the rest of us get to witness another tragedy of injustice.

Knucksline’s greater fear has nothing to do with any criminal proceeding (or the result thereof) and has everything to do with where they’re choosing to hold the trial. Why New York? Why place a big fat target on the city that was the number one target for terrorists from 1991 (under Bill Clinton, a Democrat) when the first attempt to bring down the Twin Towers occurred, through to 2001, when another terror plot was successfully executed (under George Bush II, a Republican)? New Yorkers aren’t worried about the federal courthouse or the jail where these pieces of shit will be housed during the trial. We're sure the five pieces of shit will be safe and sound. Those who traffic downtown New York City (like my wife and my son who work there and myself who travels through there twice a day) are more concerned about random acts of violence that might take place because the trial is being held so close to the original ground zero. On 9/11, a mostly Palestinian community directly across the Hudson in Jersey City danced in the streets while the Twin Towers burned and then collapsed. Yes, it was their right to dance (the cocksuckers) and nobody stopped them. It will be their right to do so again should these five pieces of shit get acquitted. It will also be their right to dance should one of their own (or anybody embracing jihad) decides to cross the river and take his or her turn at becoming a martyr to the same cause. Why tempt them? Why give them the opportunity? Why in New York?

Hold the trial in Kansas ... or Carthage, North Carolina ... or Guam ... or how about in Pakistan where you found the “alleged” mastermind of 9-11 (Khalid Sheikh Mohammed)? How about leaving New York City out of it. New Yorkers more than paid their fare share. If President Obama wants to make a point, let him make it in Washington D.C.

The Curmudgeon Party … Knucks is forming a new political party … it is called the Curmudgeon Party. Unable to find a happy medium between the several different or too much alike political parties out there, he’s decided enough is enough. Knucks says: “Sometimes we need to be compassionate and do what we can for others and sometimes we need to kick people in the ass with a steel boot. We need national health care but not without cleaning up all the goddamn fraud first. Between welfare and Medicaid fraud, we give good argument to those conservatives who point to the government and say it can’t do anything right. Let’s clean up the fraud and corruption and go about the business of providing for those in need (and we all need health coverage)."

A very brief party platform for those interested:

The two wars: They’re over. Bring back our troops and apologize for all the Iraqi, Afghani and Pakistani innocents inadvertently killed. Do what we can (if we can afford it financially AFTER we take care of Americans first) and wish those left in those countries we devastated sincere good luck. Both wars were a mistake. From now on when terrorists fuck with us, we’ll handle them without the use of troops and it won't be pretty.

Medicaid/Welfare/National Health Insurance: See above. Everybody works, even if it’s for the government (those able bodies currently on welfare get trained on how to uncover fraud in both welfare and Medicaid cases … and some go to work uncovering fraud), but EVERYBODY works (at something--even if just cleaning the streets). When the fraud is sufficiently removed, national health care becomes law, end of story.

Gay Rights: Done deal ... an amendment to the constitution guaranteeing the rights of gays to marry, divorce, adopt and do everything else the rest of us enjoy as citizens of America.

Education: no more social promotion. We’ll provide all the help we can within reason. Unless there’s some genuine inability to do so, either you learn to read and write or you learn to dig a ditch, but you don’t get to use the school system to hang out. Also, either teachers qualify and perform or they find another career. No more buildings in New York where tenured teachers on suspension get to read the Daily News and do crossword puzzles on our dime. Pay by merit, but we want teaching, not babysitting. See the John Stossel report: Stupid in America.

Athletics (in schools): If we can fund terrorists not to shoot at our soldiers overseas, we can sure provide enough domestic dollars to fund a broad athletic program at each and every school that wants one. Athletics keep a lot of kids off the streets and provide the discipline some parents can’t (or won’t) deliver. Athletics returns to American schools full throttle.

Immigration: Something has to be done to stop the flow of illegal immigrants, especially while we’re attempting to recover from the financial shakedown. Frankly, we're not sure how to handle this fairly, but we’ll figure it out and it won't take another century.



Banking Oversight: Remember all that crying Democrats did about banking oversight (even though they held the legislative controls since 2006)? Well, once they won the White House they seemed to have forgotten they’re prior public rants (Barney Frank, especially). Not a single piece of oversight legislation has been passed. Executive bonuses for bailed out companies has exceeded past bonuses by 60%. That in itself is criminal. Guess what the Curmudgeon party intends to do? President Obama stated “the party on Wall Street is over” then did NOTHING, NADA, ZIP (see SNL’s wonderful skit by Fred Armison) above. The Curmudgeon party, however, means it. If elected, the party on Wall Street really will be over ... and the next time they threaten to bring down the economy, we’ll nationalize them.

Knucksline takes a time out to congratulate Fred Armison for marrying Peggy (Elisabeth Moss) from Mad Men ... we love the show at casa Stella ...


Really Going Rogue … Knucks is considering a run for President in 2012 on the Curmudgeon ticket. The feeling here is anybody can do what our current president has done so far (nada, zip, nothing). Knucks may piss a few people off, but he'll get something done.

Stay tuned …


—Knucks

and the DOC says ...

I hate to say this, Chaz, but I tend to agree with you. The plan to have the 9/11 trial in NYC is so wrong on so many levels that I don't have enough beer to go through the whole list. Besides the incredible danger, I'm not sure we could get a conviction after all the ACLU lawyers descend upon the evidence and the somewhat questionable (to some) means used to collect it.

And how do we protect the jurors, during the trial and for the rest of their lives if they convict these clowns? Muslims have put out fatwas on cartoonists. What will they do to these jurors?

Will we have to lay bare what little we have of our intelligence gathering network in the Middle East in the interest of "facing your accuser"?

Remember when the muslims decided to "sway" the elections in Spain? What will they do in NYC to sway the verdict?

And all of this is being masterminded by Holder who basically forced pardons on the FALN terrorists. They turned them down the first time he offered them.

This looks like one of those times when we need Jack Nicholson "up on that wall", but no...we'll have Tom Cruise (Scientology's answer to Tammi Fay Baker). God help us all!

And while I am at it... screw you and your Curmudgeon Party. If I want more Socialism I'll just vote for Fredo in 2012. This Curmudgeon party just sounds like Obama in a pair of XXXXXL sweat pants. Bring back the Generalissimo!

Gay Marriage? I don't think most straight people should be allowed to be married. There is a popular former bookie on this blog who should never have gotten his marriage license. He's strictly a learners permit kind of guy.

I have never figured out why gays want to be married. Do they not realize that gay marriage begets gay divorce which begets gay alimony. Or maybe they are just swayed by all those guys in the gin mills six hours a night, seven days a week extolling the virtues of their beloved.

Go figure, Chaz
Doc

Thursday, November 12, 2009

Basketball … The Issues … Rock of the Week … and the DOC says ...

Amici:


Basketball ... I don’t know about yous, but mostly I find the basketball coverage on ESPN annoying. Then again, I don’t give a crap about basketball until it counts (8 months from now).

Basketball coverage gets in the way of NFL gossip ... like the recent yarn about my beloved new york state buffalo bills going after Michael (the dog killer) Vick. That would pretty much do it for me, amici. I now live in Jersey but refuse to root for teams that have already proved they are traders (the two Moonachie franchises). I’m not sure what happens if the Bills start selling Michael (the dog killer) Vick jerseys ... but DOC was right in his summation of the Vick situation. He did serve his time (not nearly enough for Knucksline) and has the right to do whatever he wants ... the team(s) {Philadelphia}, however, should never put him back to work.

The Issues ... recently DOC complained about our editorial board’s ignoring the issues of the day. Frankly, we feel it has to do with DOC’s über right wing penchant for blood ... but we’ll follow through to keep him happy.

The Washington D.C. sniper has been whacked. Good. Knucksline wishes the piece of garbage who slaughtered innocents in Fort Hood a speedy recovery so he too can be whacked.

Knucksline does not, however, seek to imply what this piece of crap (Nidal) did in Fort Hood has anything to do with President Obama or his policies. Nidal was a terrorist, no doubt, but he’d obviously come to be one while in the Army and he was acting alone. At another blog it was pointed out to me (in the midst of our usual political tête-à-tête) that there have been other such incidents (including the Washington DC sniper whose sidekick mentioned they were engaged in “jihad”). No President can stop loons like that (or loons like Timothy McVeigh for that matter).

Loons are unpredictable ... well, most of them are. All you can do is try to find them beforehand ... and our lack of ability to tackle that problem is why Bill Clinton’s brainstorm policy to use the FBI to find terrorists a) worked so well [sarcasm intended] and just wasn't a good idea (not that invading a country was). Like I always say, let me know when the FBI finds Whitey Bulger ...

As to “socialized medicine” ... well, I’m all for it (so pass out the chicken soup), but I would put a couple of things in place before that happened; cleaning up the fraud in both welfare and Medicaid top the list. How is it we’re currently (and apparently have been for a very long while now) funding both welfare (the genuine and the fraud) and Medicaid (the genuine and the fraud) while both the Welfare and Medicaid Fraud Divisions remain understaffed? Doesn’t it make a little bit of sense to investigate EVERY SINGLE MEDICAID and/or WELFARE CLAIM (most of which can be done so by telephone) using people currently out of work? I’d make damn sure those two are significantly cured before asking taxpayers to foot the bill for anything. Once that’s done (the fraud is substantially decreased), healthcare becomes single payer (end of story).

Since neither major party seems interested in doing anything near this fix, Knucksline suggests voting for somebody else (preferably on the left but if enough of yous are as whacky as DOC, feel free to vote for the Libertarian of your choice). Continuing to give the two party system legitimacy is absurd.

As to unemployment levels ... again, Bush still owns those figures, but as for corporate welfare abounding, it was interesting to see how Maureen Dowd avoided placing any blame on the Obama administration the other day in her article about how greedy the bailed out banks are:

Goldmine Sachs, as it’s known, is out for Goldmine Sachs.

As many Americans continue to struggle, Goldman, Morgan Stanley and JPMorgan Chase, banks that took government bailout money after throwing the entire world into crisis, have said they will dish out $30 billion in bonuses — up 60 percent from last year.

Maureen didn’t mention unemployment, but Knucksline doesn’t blame Obama for that. That one has everything to do with all the wonderful DEREGULATION Republicans introduced going back to Ronnie’s busting the air traffic controller union. That’s worked just great for the American worker ever since; outsourcing, especially [more sarcasm intended].



Rock of the Week ... oy-vey ... this one’ll be ugly. The Tennessee Tuxedos are regrouping and we suck. Lay the points and take the Tuxedos in a good old fashioned butt-whooping.


—Knucks

And the DOC says ...

Seems like an awful lot of Doc-bashing in Knucksline this week. Penchant for blood ??? Whacky ??? It’s unfortunate that we Micks don’t have the same hard line, public relations people that the Muslims do.

And the economy and the wars are still Bush’s fault? When will the Bamster get to own anything that happens on his watch? Or does he just get to do ridiculous, prep school “shout-outs” before announcing the brutal massacre of 13 American servicemen.

Next time we work out a bailout for the banks we should insist that the professors with doctorates in economics stay at the white house and shoot hoops with the Bamster. I want you there. It will go like this.

“Alright, just so yous know. I’ll lend you one billion smackeroos. When you pay me back, you pay me 1.3 billion smackeroos. If you want a few extra days, that’s fine... then yous pay me back 1.6 billion smackeroos. And of course it goes without saying that the U.S. now owns 20% of your company. Capische?”

Now that I think of it, Chaz, how come you only developed your Socialist tendencies after you left the rather profitable world of “Street Finance” ???

Your love affair of socialized medicine will last until the doctor explains to you that the amount of medicine necessary to cure your cake-swallowing, Buick-butt would take care of a family of six undocumented workers from Wazakistan. The Death Panel will put two big gauze bandages on your eyes and drop you off on the Jersey Turnpike at rush hour.

The only bright spot of the whole Hasan affair is that it happened in Texas. The Texans are well known for their two flavors of justice... Regular and Extra Crispy. But the Hoopster in Chief tells us, “Don’t jump to any conclusions.”

Well, thank you Fredo. Now, please explain to me what conclusions I could possibly jump to that aren’t absolutely, one hundred freaking percent true.

How’s that hope and change working out for you, Chaz?

Doc

Monday, November 9, 2009

Ripley Under Water … Electric Literature … MILK … Rocked Out … Knuckmeter …and the DOC says ...

Amici:

Ripley Under Water ... another tension filled Highsmith masterpiece, but I have to admit I was sorely disappointed the last thirty pages of this the last of the Ripley adventures. It was somewhat of a Deus Ex Machina ending that came 10 pages from the end and I kept hoping something would change before then, but it didn’t. Ripley is confronted by an American lunatic, David Pritchard, (although that’s never credibly explained) who calls him making believe he’s Dickie Greenleaf (Tom’s first and the only murder victim he regrets) … the mysterious caller has a wife (Janice) he abuses on a regular basis (although that also wasn’t fully developed) and the couple go about screwing with Tom’s head until somehow David has figured out where one of Tom’s “other” victims was dumped. He goes about dredging a canal until he finds it (and then leaves the bones and their wrapping on Tom’s doorstep). How Pritchard knows where Murchison (a victim from Ripley Under Ground) was dumped is another mystery never explained. A good read nonetheless (getting there was every bit as much fun as was the first four novels), but as it turned out, Ripley Under Water was the weakest of the Ripliad series.


Electric Literature (No. 1) ... I found this in the NY Times, a new venue for writers of short stories and decided to support the cause ... $10.00 big ones via amazon ... not a bad investment (but a bit overpriced vs. bulk – just five stories totaling 100 pages). It’s all good writing, don’t get me wrong. Some of it pretty brilliant (Jim Shepard’s terrific tale of two brothers, avalanches and a girl left behind), Your Fate Hurtles Down at You; Diane Wagman’s Three-Legged Dog (a woman who has had a breast removed from cancer and the first man to accept her as is, but ...). Other entries include T Cooper’s The Time Machine; Michael Cunningham’s excerpt from his novel OLYMPIA and Lydia Millet’s, Sir Henry. I’d definitely want to read the remainder of Cunningham’s novel (a tale of brothers).


MILK ... not exactly what I had expected (the movie) but Sean Penn’s performance was masterful. So were a few others. Still, I thought this one might’ve been overhyped. That said, MILK, like American History X, should be required viewing for every high school student in the country (yeah, even those who have issues with homosexuality). For the record, I thought Mickey Rourke should’ve gotten the fugazy award compared to Penn (but both were terrific in their respective roles).


Rocked Out ... did I say the Favre Bean Heads no more Packerless was an easy one over the Buc Stops in Tampa? Ooops ... and Oooops too to my Dog Killers over the Cowgirls. Well, the streak had to end sooner or later. After all, nobody is perfect.


Knuckmeter ... oy-vey, speaking of imperfectness, somebody tripped and fell off the wagon (and crushed the wheels). Momma mia, this got ugly fast.

The Principessa Ann Marie: “You ate all [emphasis added] the cake?”

The Ugly one (moi): “You know you can’t leave me alone all day.”

I thought it was a good answer. It evokes sympathy while offering a compliment (that “I can’t live without you, not even for a few hours” type thing). And don’t forget guilt “you [emphasis added] can’t leave me alone all day.”

And here’s what she had to say in response: “Listen to me, Gordo, Shamu or whatever it is you’re being called this week, when I bake a cake, I expect to eat a piece. Next time try and control yourself.”

I waited a good thirty seconds (pouting like a champ) … I sensed some guilt for the name calling. I thought there was some light at the end of the tunnel, but then she wanted to bake another cake and she opened the refrigerator.

“I suppose you were thirsty after eating all that cake, huh?” she said. “I see you drank all the milk, too.”

Like I always say, amici … it’s not easy being me.


—Knucks

And the DOC says ...

Hey, nice skirting the issues, Chaz.

Our first terrorist attack since 9/11.
- Charles Hussein Stella votes present!

The House starts the ramming of socialized medicine down our throats.
- Charles Hussein Stella votes present!

Unemployment at 17 1/2 %
- Charles Hussein Stella votes present!

Way to go big guy, lets talk about cake.

I can just picture that scene.

"Hey Charlie, shouldn't we save some cake for that she-devil who wanted to burn me?"

"Sparty, that cake is filled with bleached flour, processed sugar and saturated fats. We're doing her a favor by scarfing it down."

"But won't that hurt us too?"

"Spartster, I am an athlete. I'll burn that off at the gym."

"What about me?"

"Well, old pal of mine, don't take this the wrong way, but you're a rat. You could digest plutonium. And while you're up, get me another quart of milk from the fridge."

After our lunch on Tuesday, I have a little hint for the Principessa. Before the food comes... show that you're armed. I would recommend a harpoon. I at least got 3 slices out of 8.

So lets recap. You ate more that half of a pizza, an entire cake and your diet isn't working. Maybe you're just big-boned.

Finally, after a whole season of bad picks, 3 in a row is not a "streak". It's a fluke. I bet against the dog killers and I am working out a deal with the repo man to get my Maserati back.

Have a good week, Slim
Doc

Thursday, November 5, 2009

American Salvage … Attack of the Acorns … The Shmatta Business … FATSO … The Tournament … Rock of the Week …and the DOC says ...

Amici:

American Salvage I left off about halfway through this terrific collection of short stories by Bonnie Jo Campbell and wasn’t disappointed once I returned. In the second half were the following gems: Winter Life, Bringing Belle Home, Falling, King Cole’s American Salvage, Storm Warning, Fuel for the Millennium and Boar Taint ... if you’re into open endings and stories of life as it is, in all its often dark hues, this collection of stories will more than satisfy, especially fans of Raymond Carver. I have three favorites, Burn, King Cole’s American Salvage and Boar Taint (which ends on a wonderful note), but they are all terrific stories more than worth the price of admission. They represent Americana today without the makeup, designer jeans and/or the $400 bottle of Cristal Champagne. It is raw Americana, sometimes desperate, sometimes brutal and almost always angry. The sprinkles of hope, determination and power lend it a perfect sheen. Knucksline demands you read this collection.


Attack of the Acorns ... no, not the political organization (although come to think of it, maybe they were looking to get DOC), I’m talking about the acorns in the gigantic tree in our yard and how those suckers were dropping on DOC and I as if squirrels were hurling them down (like machine guns). Oy-vey ... the moral to this story is “when with DOC, wear a football helmet”.


The Schmatta Business ... HBO’s documentary about the garment district in New York, Schmatta: Rags To Riches To Rags is a terrific and scary look at how deregulation ultimately leaves workers with nothing much to do and can leave owners with the same (albeit much better compensated than their workers when all is said and done). The boss and I watched this the other night and just kept shaking our heads when the documentary showed how the Garment District in New York went from producing 95% of all the clothes in America during the 1960’s to now 5% in 2009. And where did those jobs go? Same place our technology jobs are going today. Thanks, Ronald Regan, Bill Clinton, George the 1st and your imbecile son and now President Obama. Thanks a million.


FATSO ... the winner in Joisey and if you personally know the new New Jersey governor and you own a business you’re in the money now. Chris (why have bidders on contracts?) Christie didn’t get that chubby working hard ... he did it taking it easy (trust me, I should know).

It’ll be interesting to see just how much our #1 in the country property taxes go down now that the right wing whale in the Governor’s seat has the controls … something tells me not much (if at all) ... but he’s a new guy on a new day so we have to wait and see before we attack any further ...

Yeah, right. This guy reeks of corruption and we’re also #1 in the country with that (and something tells me we won’t be losing the top ranking there). Knucksline will be keeping a careful eye on the blimp, you can bet your bottom dollar (after betting it on the Rock of the Week) on that.

As for John Corzine ... he spent much of his personal gelt in a losing cause and it looks like he’ll have to trot over to Washington and get in line to become the next Treasury Czar (like all those other former Goldman Sachs employees) ... then he can just bankrupt the company (AGAIN), ask for a bailout (and get it), award himself $30 million in bonus gelt to cover his losses, move to some other state and run for some other office on the Democratic Party of the People platform.

Like Poppa Tommy (Stella) used to say ... “It’s a good country, America.”

I know DOC is dying to know how my guy did ... it was okay, considering he’s completely ignored by the media and both major parties (God forbid the people are permitted to be informed of alternatives) ... Gregory Pason = 2,064 votes/0% ... hey, you gotta start somewhere.

Just Say No To T-Ball!

The Tournament ... dateline November 6, Bronx, New York: the Über Capitalists of baseball won their 27th tournament trophy and the outsourced player from Japan won the MVP of the tournament playing in T-ball stadiums only (because in the major leagues there’s no designated hitter). Also of note was the starting pitcher for the Über Capitalists was Andy (quick, juice me, I’m pitching on 3 days rest) Petite.

Fortunately, the season that never seems to end, has finally ended. There have been 104 world series (up to 1969)/tournaments (thereafter) played in Major League baseball (the National League/T-ball in the American League since the advent of “designated hitters”). The Über Capitalists have appeared in 40 of those 104 (less than half isn’t so hot when you consider all the capital they’ve poured into their efforts). They’ve won 27 of those 40 of those 104 … okay, but still, with that payroll, you’d think they can’t lose.

Let’s go Mets!


Rock of the Week ... now I could pick an easy one like the Falconless over the Skinless or the Packerless Favre Beans no more over the Buc Stops in Tampa but not I, amici ... nope, I go with the tough calls ... and since my beloved new york state buffalo bills will be vacationing this week, Knucksline says … lay the points and take the Philadelphia Dog Killing Eaglettes over the Cowgirls from Texas in yet another Tony Romo’s ribs debacle, 40-24.


—Knucks

And the DOC says ...

Hey Chaz,

The facts seem to change about every 3 hours on what exactly was going on with the latest emissary of the religion of peace, so I'm not going to go into that now. Three hours ago they said the fucker was dead... now he is not. I hope he lives, so we can hang him. Is that normal?

My lawyer has suggested that I not speak of that whole "acorn" incident until all my tests are in, but he said it definitely sounded like "reckless endangerment" on your part. You might want to give Spartacus a little heads-up. He probably won't like the new owners.

You are upset about outsourcing because you don't see the big picture. Eventually, all of our jobs will be done in India and they will have no one to make cheap, badly sized clothing or cheesey tourist crap. At the same time, we Americans will all be sitting by the mailbox waiting for our unemployment checks. Supply and demand. I'm already working on a Shiva the Destroyer doll that looks just like Nancy Pelosi.

Yup, the fat boy is our next governor. I was so impressed with him I bought the Jersey special... 5 for $20. This state does have some good features. In NY you can only vote once. But don't you be embarassed, your guy did good. What was it again ? Zero percent. He makes Nader look like an over achiever.

Concerning the lock of the week... Your record as of late has been pretty darn good. I've bet on the wife beaters, the gun carriers, the steroid shooters. Hell, my favorite team is the Bengals, a veritable smorgasbord of felonies, but I can't bet on the dog killers. I'm gonna put my swine flu shot on Ebay and go for the Cowboys. It's not a disgrace that they let him play football again. He served his time. It's a disgrace that any team would want him.

Have a nice weekend, buddy-boy
Doc

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Honeymoon Over … Flyers/Skankies … Sarah Jessica Parker … Kate Gosselin … and the DOC says ...

Amici:


Honeymoon Over … You know the Obama honeymoon is over when MSNBC goes on a 2 hour rant about how George Bush got us into two wars … it’s almost as if they are oblivious to the fact that their savior can (whenever he thinks it prudent/what he campaigned on) get us out of either or both of those same wars. The fact he labeled one “the wrong war in the wrong place at the wrong time” doesn’t seem to affect either Rachel Maddow or Keith Olbermann. There they were last night trumping up Bush’s wars.

For the record, it’s now the 287th day since Obama was inaugurated after campaigning for a “necessary” war in Afghanistan and against “the wrong war in the wrong place at the wrong time” in Iraq (where, Keitho and Rachel, we firmly remain). The only difference between Bush (who started these wars and should be held accountable) and Obama (who hasn't moved an iota to get us out of them) is Bush needed to cross the aisle for Democratic Congressional support to start those wars and Obama has a clear Democratic Majority and isn't getting us out of them.

It was nice to see Ariana Huffington on Morning Joe this morning (Scarborough, remember, is the one the Principessa Ann Marie has fantasy dreams about) discussing how much the charismatic one has let down the left (his cave in to the health industry and his inability to remove us from either or both wars) and how much he seems to be continuing George Bush’s policies (his Wall Street appointments to the Treasury Department and his support for Wall Street at our expense). Most so-called liberal democrats are just as eager to cave in to whatever Obama does by ignoring his ignoring them and pointing fingers at whackos on the extreme right. Not very effective (for their cause) but it must make them feel very good about themselves.

DOC is coming over at 2:00 p.m. for “brewskies” (translation: he’s hijacking a Budweiser truck). We’ll be having a 5 minute discussion on the proper use of commas and it’s vs. its (something Eagle Eye Bludeau likes to point out to me how often I mix the two up) and then getting down to some serious drinking (because I have the day off and he always has the day off).

Flyers/Skankies … wow, this Utley guy can hit … but I was sure the Skankies and their steroid admitting (after getting bagged) stars would finish the Flyers off last night. As it turned out, the Skankies appear to need to spend a few more hundred million on relief pitching that can get them to Mariano Rivera. Game 6 of the tournament in the Bronx (the house that the citizens of New York, including those laid off, subsidized). There's nothing quite like corporate welfare, is there, amici?

Sarah Jessica Parker … always one to keep himself in the news, the President has appointed a new mini czar to his Committee on the Arts and Humanities. I’m not sure how that makes those out of work feel, but it probably goes a long way to paying off his debts to Hollywood.

Kate Gosselin … in equally important news, this broad confesses that she was very hard on Jon. Just who these people are remains a mystery to the ugly one, but I saw it on Google News (close to the Arts & Humanities Committee story so I figured it was important). Surely, since she’s so apologetic now (according to the article), she too is deserving of a Nobel Peace Prize.

—Knucks

and the DOC says ...

Hey Chaz,

I guess I turned too soon. I figured you were drunk and forgot I was back there and we would both end up at the train station in Staten Island. The only difference being that I did not want to go to Staten Island. I got home at 8:35 so I didn't get as lost as last time.

I think we should add a new feature to Knucksline. The video of the week. One for me and one for you. You know, the rico suave', cosmopolitan redneck (me) and the left wing, knuckle dragging communist (you). What do you think? Country music vs. Opera... Comedy... movie clips. Do you think it's better if we embed the videos instead of giving the link? Just to clarify things, when I say "we", I mean "you".

For example, you could do your favorite aria from Rigoletto and I could do

What do you think?
Doc

I just saw Christie's acceptance speech. We've got problems. It looks like Christie's wife is Wednesday Addams all grown up. She is a definite whack job.

Sunday, November 1, 2009

Boy’s Life … American Salvage … Ripley’s Game (the movie) … New Jersey Governor ... Baseball … Emergency Update …

Amici:

Boy’s Life ... a recommended read from the good fellas (not goodfellas) at Men Reading Books (who have been more than kind to yours truly). This Robert McCammon novel was written from the perspective of a young boy growing up in the small town of Zephyr, Albama. His dad is a milkman (remember them?) who (along with Cory, the narrator), after a near car crash, witnesses the other car plunging into a deep lake. When the Dad tries to save the driver he sees the man has been beaten (possibly tortured) and strangled and had been handcuffed to the steering wheel. That is the background to this wonderful book that propels the storyline to its conclusion. The real story is the growth of a young man and all that he is, as were most young boys, confronted with; love, anger, bullies, prejudice, hypocrisy, superstition, cruelty, kindness, girls, lost innocence and death. There are so many points in this novel where I was choked up (I can hear DOC now), it became difficult to read in public (where I do most of my reading—during our long commute to and from work).

The beauty of books like this one (for moi) is the nostalgic effect. Reading about Lorna Doons and Combat and riding bicycles (once something to look forward to) and all the things I can associate with my own youth, the fonder childhood memories of it, make it all the more enjoyable. Perhaps it is a generational read (our generation). I honestly don’t know anymore. My own kids (the one that does and those that don’t talk to me) had newer toys to bond with, I guess. I mean, they didn’t even think The Exorcist was scary.

Kids ...

This is a highly recommended read for all yous men (and, hell, some of yous broads might like it too). A wonderful, wonderful ultimately feel good book.


American Salvage ... also a highly recommended read but not if you’re looking to feel particularly cheerful when you're finished. This is a gripping collection of short stories by Bonnie Jo Campbell I learned about from Patti Abbott’s blog. It centers around Kalamazoo, Michigan. High unemployment, ignorance and some nasty forms of cruelty cover a lot of ground in these masterful stories: a rape victim and the polar opposite life of the girl found hiding in her closet after she's been assaulted; a yard man’s attempt to hang on to his core optimism as well as his family when things go south; a tough mother trying to make it day to day in a world of men (including her son whom seems well on his way to an all too predictable future {“Men wanted to focus on just one big thing, leaving the thousands of smaller messes for the women around them to clean up.”}; the implications of a car accident that will chill you to the bone; one man’s possible solutions to dealing with his meth addicted wife; a man with goodness some of his life has buried within him having to deal with what he sees around him (while what he accidentally does to himself with spilled gasoline and a match—so far my favorite of the bunch); a family reunion that incorporates a sharp-shooting missy and a beautiful piece of justice ... I’ve a few more stories to go but just based on what I’ve read, this collection is a MUST READ. Do it, amici.

We'll definitely be reviewing the remainder of the stories, amici ... great books deserve double exposure and we at Knucksline like the idea of pushing them.


Ripley’s Game (the movie) ... starring John Malkovich (who delivers a few classic Malkovich lines, but they are so foreign from the Patricia Highsmith character, they seem absurd after reading the books). Take a pass ... this was a genuine stinker and so off the book it pissed me off no end.


New Jersey Governor ... well, this wasn’t hard ... because Ralph Nader isn’t running for Governor in New Jersey, me and 300 of my bestist friends are voting for the socialist candidate, Greg Pason. I’ve tried both major parties and between the Democrats and Republicans is one unwashed pubic hair as far as Knucksline is concerned. Yous can have them.

As for the tub of lard DOC will be voting for ... well, notably, his aunt's brother-in-law is a convicted felon of the notorious Genovese crime family (not that that makes him a bad guy). He was appointed to the U.S. attorney’s office by DoubleYa {“Great job, Brownie”} (so, enough said), but there’s more ... Christie has been accused of using his office's role in crafting deferred prosecution agreements to award lucrative federal monitoring positions in no-bid contracts to friends, supporters, and allies. Great, just what the most corrupt state in the union needs ... another corrupt official.

Not that the Democrat (Corzine) is any better. This clown, after his departure from Goldman Sachs, earned what has been estimated to be $400 million during the 1999 initial public offering of the company. What any one man can do with $400 million is beyond me, but I'm sure all those laid off at Goldman in his wake are happy for him. Corzine has so much money he can’t relate to the constant taxing of his constituents (New Jersey is #6 in property taxes) ... taxing for the benefit of whom? Not the people, that's for sure.


Baseball ... the highlight of game three for me was watching K-Rod blowing his nose on national television. He may not be able to hit, but he sure can blow a streamer. The wife nearly upchucked her Diet Coke on that one.

“Oh, God, that’s disgusting,” she said. “I can’t watch this.”

Streamers aside, you think maybe it’s about time MLB uses instant replay? I mean how many blown calls (with a pair of extra umps) are we gonna have to suffer through before the dirtiest game in sport history (if you think the Black Sox scandal was the only series (or games) fixed you probably believe in the Easter Bunny, too) comes to terms with reality. So far there have been 3 or 4 completely blown calls in the world tournament alone. Forget Pete Rose, baseball has the same issues as the NBA and every other sport … where’s there’s a lot of green to be made, there’s corruption, end of story.


Emergency Update ... the Rangers are laying 3½ ... not to worry, they’ll win by 10.

—Knucks

and the DOC says ...

Really Chaz,

"his aunt's brother-in-law is a convicted felon of the notorious Genovese crime family". Are you auditioning for a job at MSNBC? Which one are you... the pot... or the kettle?

Bear in mind, this is Jersey we're talking about. That might be just the kind of street creds that he (the tub of lard) needs to push him over the top.

Concerning this Pason guy... what about him do you like the best? The fact that he's a socialist or the fact that he can't possibly win. So somehow in the two-stroke, weed-whacker engine of that brain of yours, this gets you off the hook. No matter which crook we get... it's not your fault.

"Fuhgeddaboudit, yous picked him. I voted for the commie." I'm assuming you've investigated that Pason's aunt's brother-in-law is of high moral fiber.

Nice call on the Texans, buddy-boy. Is that three in a row now? So I have another week of Old Milwaukee and peanut butter sandwiches.

Your pal,
Doc